I feel better today,but now guilty.Yesterday was such a blah day and it didnt even dawn on me that it was the 9 mth.mark of Bruces death.I have a habit of changing the time in advance.Like about a mth before my birthday I said I was 46 although I was still 45.I've been saying Bruce has been gone 9 mths since the begining of Feb.I dont believe thats why I felt blah though.I think thats going to happen every once in a while for the rest of my days.And now I'm going to talk myself out of feeling guilty too.Just because I missed the date doent mean I miss him any less.Bruce would be pissed at me for feeling guilty anyway.He used to tell me that feeling guilty was a waste of energy.So thats enough of that and I'm going to shut up now.My confusion drives me crazy,I can only imagine what everybody else thinks.lol.