Today I'm feeling pretty good. I never new there was a Pregnancy & Infant Loss Rememberance Day until I started Googling "miscarriage". So that day is today so I went out and bought a special candle that I will only light on this Day every year, her b-day, & Christmas. It was pretty fitting. The name of the candle is "Angel Kisses". It is a very light vanilla scent. At dinner we lit the candle and talked about Karena. I never want her to be forgotten. Lately people have been telling me that they are surprised how well I am handling this. When they say that I actually feel bad, like I should be crying all the time so they know how badly I am hurting. I'm not one to cry in front of people ( I do sometimes). I like to be alone and cry. I have cried myself to sleep most nights over the last 12 days. I think people expect when they see me, that I would be a blubbering mess! Does anyone feel this way?
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I think the candle sounds like a beautiful way to honor Karena\'s memory.
I definitely feel like people are always asking me the loaded \"How are you doing\" question....I\'m still not sure how to answer. It doesn\'t really seem right to say that I\'m fine, but I can\'t exactly say that I\'m terrible either. I\'m coping, I guess. But is that an answer I want to give people? I wish I could come up with a good response that I could use all the time....let me know if you think of one!