Sometimes I just wish that I could go on a vacation. I wish that I could get far away from St. Martinville, Louisiana. This is not a good parish. They don't understand that my child is not a regular student. That her mood alters at spontaneous times. They make me feel like I am not a good parent when I have tried to get all of the help that I can for her. But Louisiana doesn't have much to offer my child. If I had enough money, I would of relocated to a better state that would take the time to work with my little girl and help her to get better. This isn't fair that she has to suffer like this. I think that she deserves to be treated better and they should try to understand her frustration. I really think that if she wasn't bipolar, that she would do fine. It hurts my heart to see my daughter suffer so much. Sometimes, I don't even have enough money to get her medication nor take her to the doctor. Sometimes I have to sacrifice a bill just to make sure that her and her brother get the proper care that they need. Right now I just feel like my world has fell apart. What used to be full of beautiful roses has all of a sudden turned into black roses. My hopes, my dreams, what could have been, is very uncertain at this very moment. I am scared out of my mind. I just wish my family could understand that I need them now. My mom and my sister especially. But how can I talk to them, and let them know that I am suffering. How?  I still believe that God has his hands on me and my family. It's just that sometimes it's hard to believe that he will come through. A lot of what's going on seems very overwhelming to me. I cry from the inside but try my mightest to hold it together from the outside. I try to act like the strong one when in reality I am not.I go to church, I pray, I read the Bible every now and then. I also try to help others with their situations and that does make me feel better. I know that I will be able to bounce back after the court date, and after finding out the results. All I know is that I just want everthing to be better in my home. I want stability. I want to be able to go and work and make my own money. I also want to study and become an IT professional.For right now I am going to try to stay strong for my little girl and continue to fight for her all the way through. Just continue to keep us in your prayers. We the Rangel's do appreciate the prayers.