General Update
Man, the holidays were rough. Seeing excited kids and families everywhere...I just kept thinking about how we would have been celebrating with our little one next year. It would have been our last Christmas without a baby.
Combine all of that with being in the 2ww...not good.
AF was due the day before our 5th anniversary, but thankfully waited until the day after. At least I could enjoy anniversary sex. :)
Downside, though, is that it was extremely painful. And the pain has continued. I started having cramping early in the 2ww which turned to sharp pain during AF. The pain has decreased in intensity but is still there. It seems to have concentrated on the left side, around the ovary.
I went to the Dr this morning. She did an ultrasound. There is fluid around the left ovary, suggesting that there was a cyst. If so, it has already ruptured, so that is good news. She said that could have been the source of the pain, and if so it will likely continue to decrease and eventually resolve itself.
We also discussed how things have been since I miscarried. The first cycle, I ovulated and AF was right on time. The next cycle was 39 days and the last was 35. During both cycles, OPK's were screwy.
Normally, I ovulate on CD17. I start taking OPKs on CD10 or 11. They start out with just the control line. Then about 3 days before ovulation, I start seeing a faint 2nd line, which gets gradually darker until I ovulate. That's a normal cycle - which I had been having for a few months before getting pregnant.
The last 2 cycles, however, on the first OPK on CD10, I already had a faint 2nd line. Then it got darker, then lighter, then darker, etc. This time I started testing on CD4. It started out with just the control line but I started getting a faint 2nd line around CD8 and today - CD11 - the line was about equal in darkness.
So I was already questioning whether I had actually ovulated those cycles and had no idea what was going on this time. My Dr says that the OPKs behavior combined with the longer cycles means it is very unlikely that I am ovulating. Also, she thinks it is unlikely that I will ovulate this time, given the fluid around the left ovary and there were only 2 small follicles on the right. Not sure why, but I assume that post-miscarriage, my body just can't figure out what it is supposed to do. Anyone have any ideas on that?
My Dr said we could just wait it out and see if my body gets back in gear. I mean, this last cycle was shorter than the previous one, so it seems that things are heading that way. But she suggested, given my age and how long we've been trying, that we try Femara next cycle to ensure I ovulate. And maybe that will kickstart my body back into the whole ovulating mode.
She also joked that we should restart the insurance appeal process for an IUI, since last time we started it I got pregnant.
I talked it over with Matt and we both feel good about moving forward with Femara. We are also going to move ahead with our insurance appeal. Matt says at the least it's good to have another option.
I'm feeling very relieved to have a plan. I have felt so...adrift. Having a plan gives me some sense of control, of doing something, not just waiting and hoping.
Combine all of that with being in the 2ww...not good.
AF was due the day before our 5th anniversary, but thankfully waited until the day after. At least I could enjoy anniversary sex. :)
Downside, though, is that it was extremely painful. And the pain has continued. I started having cramping early in the 2ww which turned to sharp pain during AF. The pain has decreased in intensity but is still there. It seems to have concentrated on the left side, around the ovary.
I went to the Dr this morning. She did an ultrasound. There is fluid around the left ovary, suggesting that there was a cyst. If so, it has already ruptured, so that is good news. She said that could have been the source of the pain, and if so it will likely continue to decrease and eventually resolve itself.
We also discussed how things have been since I miscarried. The first cycle, I ovulated and AF was right on time. The next cycle was 39 days and the last was 35. During both cycles, OPK's were screwy.
Normally, I ovulate on CD17. I start taking OPKs on CD10 or 11. They start out with just the control line. Then about 3 days before ovulation, I start seeing a faint 2nd line, which gets gradually darker until I ovulate. That's a normal cycle - which I had been having for a few months before getting pregnant.
The last 2 cycles, however, on the first OPK on CD10, I already had a faint 2nd line. Then it got darker, then lighter, then darker, etc. This time I started testing on CD4. It started out with just the control line but I started getting a faint 2nd line around CD8 and today - CD11 - the line was about equal in darkness.
So I was already questioning whether I had actually ovulated those cycles and had no idea what was going on this time. My Dr says that the OPKs behavior combined with the longer cycles means it is very unlikely that I am ovulating. Also, she thinks it is unlikely that I will ovulate this time, given the fluid around the left ovary and there were only 2 small follicles on the right. Not sure why, but I assume that post-miscarriage, my body just can't figure out what it is supposed to do. Anyone have any ideas on that?
My Dr said we could just wait it out and see if my body gets back in gear. I mean, this last cycle was shorter than the previous one, so it seems that things are heading that way. But she suggested, given my age and how long we've been trying, that we try Femara next cycle to ensure I ovulate. And maybe that will kickstart my body back into the whole ovulating mode.
She also joked that we should restart the insurance appeal process for an IUI, since last time we started it I got pregnant.
I talked it over with Matt and we both feel good about moving forward with Femara. We are also going to move ahead with our insurance appeal. Matt says at the least it's good to have another option.
I'm feeling very relieved to have a plan. I have felt so...adrift. Having a plan gives me some sense of control, of doing something, not just waiting and hoping.
Replies
I\'m so happy to hear from you. I\'m sorry the holidays were so hard. Happy families when you\'re not happy are the worst to be around. Just like you I\'m so glad they are finally over.
I\'m excited that you have a plan to ttc again. Nothing brings hope after such heartache as a new plan. And I agree that it\'s def. a good idea to start the insurance appeal, just to have that option in your back pocket, even though hopefully you won\'t need it! Hugs!
You\'ve been on my mind. Good to hear from you. I know the holidays must have been rough, they were hard for me too. I\'m glad to hear you have a plan and I\'m hoping 2014 brings you good news and better days. Hugs.
There is so little control that we do have over our IF and TTC but like you stated, its so much better to have a plan than to drift aimlessly. I\'m glad you have been able to formulate a plan and are starting to move forward!