I have not been writing lately, but I decided to come back. I am still gambling, it is so freakin hard, I am working on paying a bunch of payday loans back, and hopefully I have learned a big lesson from all this, when I go to the casino now I leave the mac card home. I get so bored and feel like I have no life or have no fun I work two jobs and go to school, in about another year I should have my bachelors degree, I feel like I have no friends and no one to talk to, I could not even tell my friends and family how deep in debt I really am and I have to pretend, that everything is so wonderful when it really isn't. How can I control myself I do not know what to do anymore. I have so much crap going on right now with work and school, and I have the stepson from you no where who causes me alot of stress. Well gotta go now, it is getting kind of late.