I'm pissed off about getting raped. I can't sleep because I keep thinking about it. Not even just raped, everything. I'm such a stronger person now and there is no way I would let that happen to me now. I'm not angry at myself for letting it happen, because I was a child. I'm angry at him! he was older,he should know better. The guy what abused me, he is about 2 and a half years older than me. He is still  in the same shitty band, he got a 2:2 in his degree, I doubt he even has a job! He's still with the same girlfriend he got right after he left me, who even looks exactly how I used to look. Its like he's exactly the same person. And his band is SO SHIT, and the photography and graphic design on the website is even worse. I hate this guy!!!! But I feel good that I'm better than him. Because I AM better than him. I might not be a good person but I never did the shit he did. Fucker.  I'm gonna talk more about this later....I'm not done with this yet.