ugh I've had such a bad day today, I lost all my work! The hand in date is monday and I worked SO hard on it. I managed to get it all done again this after noon with the help of my boyfriend (he was responsible for losing it).All my friends have gone to this big event in town (its like a christmas festival kind of thing, the christmas lights) it sounds really fun but I haven't gone.I know thats bad, I know I'm withdrawing from everyone. Stopping doing fun things, destructing my relationship with my friends, isolating myself. I KNOW thats what I'm doing and I know how I can stop it. Tell people how I'm feeling, do fun things with them, be more active socially, not just stressing out about school work all the time. I know thats what I should be doing, but I just can't pull myself out of this or take any positive steps. I don't want to. I want to be by myself, I love it when my friends go out so I can be in the house by myself. Its so unlike me, this stomach thing has given me the perfect excuse to not have to socialise any more. Its so wierd, im so wierd.  I'm thinking really bad thoughts, like I'm just an inconvenience to everybody who knows me. I feel like I should kill myself, I feel like I want to be away from everybody. I wish I was all alone on an island or something sometimes. My moods go up and down and I know this is going into a BIG down. I just hope it doesn't last too long.