Hi,So I had a bit of an odd week. Didn't check in or post here on DH and it really affected my spirits! I get so much out of you ladies and all of your help and support.The good news for me is that my eggs are growing at the same pace. Last night was my last night of BCPS and waiting for AF. See my RE on Day 2 and begin stimulation drugs on Day 3 with an egg extraction approx 10 days later. I feel really good about it and about my doctor. My DH is being terrific and I am so grateful. So I dont understand why I have been so blue. I must check the nagging dread and doubts and get back to a place of absolute certainty. I was typing on the discussion post and was I was writing 'starting my second IVF cycle" I started to write failed- This scares me about my feelings and I know how important the mind body connection is. I am recommiting to checking in here daily. I really get so much from you all and want to give back as well.Yesterday my three friends came over for our regular Friday night get togethers. They all know what we have being going thru and they are all mothers. One of them, Catherine decided to announce when she arrived that she is 4 weeks pregnant with her second child! It not only was unplanned, but two months ago she was calling lawyers about splitting from her boyfriend who has a drug, alcohol and verbal abuse problem! She even said she had called childrens service for advice! So you can imaginemy shock as she giggled and told me she had slept with him all thru xmas- I gues sshe had just started back on th pill but it was the first month! She is 40 and she has not even told the father who is touring with his band and she thinks he will flip. Then when my other two friends arrived she was yattering on and on about how happy she is, what kind of birth she wants on and on. I have always felt that she is a little bit jealous of me- My DH is not a practicing alcoholic who cheats and is stingy with money- and that she was subtly happy to "stick it to me"- It just blindsided me- I mean, call me privately the day before you are coming- give me a chance to process so I can be happy for you- dont just arrive at my house right as I start my IVF and make it all about "how happy you are to be pregnant!!!!"I have never wanted to be the "bitter, infertile one" and I am always around my friends kids. This really hurt me though and after two hours of her I lost it and went into my room in tears. Apparently my other friend suggested she apologize and suggested that she was being a little insensitive. She came in my bedroom but it was just like the dam broke and I asked her to leave. I couldnt help it- I was so upset. Now she has made it all about her- and claims to my other friends that she was "shamed and will not be attending Friday nights anymore"Anyway- so much drama. You would think we were 15 not 40. I was so upset all night and for most of today. I just felt so hurt, frustrated, misunderstood and alone. I know that you can all relate. I just think she could have used a little sensitivity and waited a bit-why do I need to know before the father??So, I need some DH postive attitude adjustment!!!