why me? why him? why us? i just wanna scream! i miss him!!!!!!! i'm angry and sad and miserable. i just want to go back. why can't i go back. why can't i runaway? why couldn't i go with him? it's not fair. i am so jealous of everyone who gets to be happy and grow old with the one they love. CJ is the only one i love. the only one i ever loved. he was my world. he still is my world. i don't want someone else. no one else could possibly compare. CJ went above and beyond and was caring and understanding and let me be me without any questions asked. he knew how to put up with me he knew how to handle me at my crazy times and love me all the time. he was my fate. my soulmate. and he was ripped from my grip. he was taken when i was right there. RIGHT THERE! i'm so tired of missing and crying and loneliness. i want him. come back CJ. don't you see me here? don't you hear me? i need you.
Replies
Sweety, I feel the same way. Somedays I don\'t know how I get through them. There is an ache in my heart that never and will never go away. I also hate seeing happy couples together. After Ivan died, almost all of our friends decided to get married & have babies! I guess they understood what was really important but, WHAT ABOUT US?!?!?! Our whole lives have changed. I feel like maybe if I change myself so much that maybe I won\'t recongize myself with Ivan anymore. It\'s just so hard. I don\'t even know who I am without Ivan, my love.
My God give you the strenght somehow. Your friend at DS.