ok, here is the story as to what has been going on here. i didnt want to say anything until trey said it was ok to. over the last several months, trey has declined mentally and his drinking has gotten alot worse. he even recently had 2 blackouts in a weeks time and the last one was pretty ugly. that is why i got my last tattoo. i just needed to feel some pain, you know. it was a design i wanted for quite awhile, so i just went out and got it that night. 2 weeks ago, he discussed with his therapist about going into rehab. he agreed. so this past week, i found him a really good place on the upper east side. it is a psychiatric hospital that has a unit for those dependent on alcohol and drugs. i was told that the morning he is ready, to call admitting to see if there is a bed. when i called this morning, there was none, so we have to try tomorrow. understandably so, he is very nervous about this. not only will he be treated for both issues, it is a nonsmoking place which they would help him with as well. he is also terrified of having panic attacks there. most likely, he would not be allowed to take klonopin, but they assured me not to worry because they do specialize in all psychiatric problems. even though he is nervous as hell, he does want to do this. ultimately it would be much better for him to do this in order to get the help he really needs. it will also be so much better for our marriage which has been affected by all of this. it is going to be a very difficult time for so many reasons including being apart for 30 days. he will be able to call me and i would be able to visit him for an hour each day. so at least we have that. so thats the story. trey does have an account here though he hasnt been on for awhile and i am not sure if he will check it before he goes in...but if anybody here wants to send him some support, i am sure he will truly appreciate it, even if he reads it when he gets back. his id here is treyros. if for whatever reason you cant find him, he is on my friends list.i will keep you all posted. thanks all of you for being there for me.