Hi, thought all the celebrations around the world, and Ive gone on the internet and saw some already, but then questions start rolling into my mind, and I know I shall not get the answers, Not tonight atleast,.. I am wondering alot, and Missing carole, and realizing the new year will be empty without her.I am slipping a little, and just realized I forgot to take my medicine today, so maybe that is part of it.I have not ever been diagnosed with Bi-polar, but I definitly go like on a slide to feeling ok then feeling pretty good then sliding down again, I need to talk to my doctor but it seems that's going to be delayed cause I got the call today that I need a referal, yes they are more interested in getting PAID then in ME, and with the Holiday that will delay things.I called work today about the PIV and my Boss was cool, seemed to understand that we needed more people in that store next sunday, so I think it will be done.Im so worried about our money situation it's not funny, I know worrying won't help but it's not good right now.The fence is still ok, haha, hope it stays that way..Fireworks are going off all around, I usually don't do fireworks only on the 4th, and sometimes not even then.I don't think I have much to celebrate tonight, but it's an interesting time this new years..Yes, Im hoping a w-2 arrives and I can file taxes and get the refund to save our house, to bad I have to spend it that way, but I have no choice, and after that's done I will have better piece of mind.Also after that's done, I want to start saving for a Laptop I saw today at the store, not extreamly expensive, and i think it would be neat I can keep  up with things better if I could do it from the Bedroom, it tires me out so much sitting here, Im not sure why but it does..Verizon is offering specials on Fios, I might break down shortly after the laptop and next taxes are paid and switch over im not sure yet. I know they want my DSL to be gone, and Might Force the issue in the near future..Oh I have something else to say and get into atleast with someone, but not here yet, but I don't know to whom or here yet, Im going to have to hold it in for a little while Im afraid.I wish Mom was here, I really do.. she could help...Well, guess I will end this entry, everyone be safe, and ill catch you on the Flip Side next year..  Michael