I’m so scared; I don’t know what is going on with me right now and all day today. I had to call into work today and I think I might have to tomorrow. I have not been feeling to well; it started last night when I was sleeping. I am having hard time breathing, I can touch myself in the legs and it feels like my muscles are sore. I’m dizzy; right now my back is starting to hurt. I feel like, well it is so hard to explain.  I also woke up last Friday with this bump on my forehead and now it is red and getting bigger. I am feeling a little over whelmed. I have not cried form Knowing I have HIV  in a long time but tonight I did and in front of my 15 years old, I even said to him I can’t take this anymore, and you know I can’t.I do have an appointment with my HIV doctor at 9am, so I guess I will see what is going on with me and where my numbers are.Yes, I am crying right now I just am sick of being sick, I guess I just can’t handle being HIV anymore.I guess I better stop writing I need to lay down.  Mary  P.S. It it so wierd how one day one can fell great and within hours you just fell like shit,.