Part 2
When I came home from the hospital I had asked my 14 year old if he new what was wrong with me, he told me no. I then told him I have HIV, I could not believe what he said to me, He told me (that is what you get). I guess I did deserve it, because I did not use protection, plus about 2 weeks before that I was having a talk with him about never having sex unless you use condoms because there are so many diseases out there. So what does mom do, have unsafe sex. I tell you, Im not sure if he is still made at me or not, I think I will ask him (Hold on). He told me no. he was so made at me because he thought he was going to lose me until I told him I was going to live another 20-30 years, so I hope I make it that long, I do want to see my kids get married and have children of there own. My 14 year old has seen so much of my depression from this, the crying the argument with the man that gave it to me, all my break downs, I dont know what I had done to deserve him, he had held me and told me that it will be ok mom. I am blessed. For my 20 year old daughter I dont call her when I break down because when she found out she became depressed and had anxiety. I do not want for her to worry about me. So for my kids I dont know what I do with out them.
A old girl friend of mine that I got back in touch with about 4 months before I found out. She had called when I was in the hospital all my son told her was that I was sick, I did not hear from her until about 3 days after I got out of the hospital. She did ask what was wrong, I could not tell her so I lied and told her I had mono. Then a few days later she called back again, I did not want to talk with her because I new I would breakdown, and that is what I did. I started crying and told her I had something to tell her, so I said I hated lying to you and I need to tell you I have HIV. She told me how sorry she was and if there was anything I needed to call her, she was even going to come over and help me clean because I was so weak, but I didnt let her. I cant believe she told me if I needed her to come over in the middle of the night, and I needed someone to hold me that she would be over. I did think about a few times but I have my pillow. She is a good friend she would call almost every day to see how I was; now she just calls and make me laugh. I have not seen her since I was diagnosed. Well this is it for now part 3 another time. Thank for reading. Mary
When I came home from the hospital I had asked my 14 year old if he new what was wrong with me, he told me no. I then told him I have HIV, I could not believe what he said to me, He told me (that is what you get). I guess I did deserve it, because I did not use protection, plus about 2 weeks before that I was having a talk with him about never having sex unless you use condoms because there are so many diseases out there. So what does mom do, have unsafe sex. I tell you, Im not sure if he is still made at me or not, I think I will ask him (Hold on). He told me no. he was so made at me because he thought he was going to lose me until I told him I was going to live another 20-30 years, so I hope I make it that long, I do want to see my kids get married and have children of there own. My 14 year old has seen so much of my depression from this, the crying the argument with the man that gave it to me, all my break downs, I dont know what I had done to deserve him, he had held me and told me that it will be ok mom. I am blessed. For my 20 year old daughter I dont call her when I break down because when she found out she became depressed and had anxiety. I do not want for her to worry about me. So for my kids I dont know what I do with out them.
A old girl friend of mine that I got back in touch with about 4 months before I found out. She had called when I was in the hospital all my son told her was that I was sick, I did not hear from her until about 3 days after I got out of the hospital. She did ask what was wrong, I could not tell her so I lied and told her I had mono. Then a few days later she called back again, I did not want to talk with her because I new I would breakdown, and that is what I did. I started crying and told her I had something to tell her, so I said I hated lying to you and I need to tell you I have HIV. She told me how sorry she was and if there was anything I needed to call her, she was even going to come over and help me clean because I was so weak, but I didnt let her. I cant believe she told me if I needed her to come over in the middle of the night, and I needed someone to hold me that she would be over. I did think about a few times but I have my pillow. She is a good friend she would call almost every day to see how I was; now she just calls and make me laugh. I have not seen her since I was diagnosed. Well this is it for now part 3 another time. Thank for reading. Mary
Replies
you are finding out that there are real friends in this world and im glad you have such a great friend to lean on if you want
I know I have a friend I can lean on, the problem is I hate to ask, I\'m so use to being alone that when I need her, I never call her.