I did it!
As strange as it sounds ~ it was hard but I said no to my #2 son. After his drinking/driving blackout episode ~ we never really did a sit down with him. Things were crazy, busy ~ he was working a lot ~ Thanksgiving ~ in-laws here ~ then we were down a car so I didn't have to tell him he couldn't use the car for socializing ~ and then he got sick. Today, although he's still sick he asked if he could drive the car to his friend's house to hang out because he was tired of sitting at home. I told him he couldn't have the car based on the fact that he ignored me when I told him he was not to use the car after work because of his drinking episode (he gets out of work at 1am). He didn't even put gas in the car - I had to fill it up yesterday because it was on E.
It was difficult saying no to him because he is so nice to be around AND I've enjoyed the peace. He hasn't been told no much and he is thoughtful and such a great helper around the house. Unlike my other one when he was in the middle of the heavy using - it was much harder to draw the line with J. And truth be told ~ it would be nice to have some peace and the house to myself. It needed to be done. Last night when my hubby and I went for a walk - he wanted to put the conversation off. Easy for him - when it comes down to it - he's seldom around (evenings too) so I'm the one. Whatever - it would have been much easier to say yes - but I know it was the right thing.
Update: He got a ride from his friend. Told me it wasn't possible. Right....... Now I have peace........
2nd update: He called me at 1am and asked me to come and pick him up (about a 25 minute ride one way). After throwing numerous questions at him as to why he can't get a ride home - he said "never mind". Fine. It took me an hour to get back to sleep. *He told me he wasn't feeling well and didn't want to wait until his friend were ready to go. Poor baby. No more.
Note: he called me yesterday asking me to get him a doctor's appointment. He went and found out that he has a severe case of strep. Can't take zithromax because he's allergic. Taking a milder antibiotic but doctor told him to double up the first few doses. If he isn't seeing any improvement today he may have to go the ENT and have "surgery". He told me he might have a cyst in the back of his throat. Last night he said "Thanks Mom for helping me so much".
Next day: Today he hand signaled me saying he needed to see the ENT. He went, had pus cut out of his throat, and was in extreme pain when he came home. He was almost crying. Doc ordered 60 pills of Vicodin. Keeping them safe until he needs the next one.
It was difficult saying no to him because he is so nice to be around AND I've enjoyed the peace. He hasn't been told no much and he is thoughtful and such a great helper around the house. Unlike my other one when he was in the middle of the heavy using - it was much harder to draw the line with J. And truth be told ~ it would be nice to have some peace and the house to myself. It needed to be done. Last night when my hubby and I went for a walk - he wanted to put the conversation off. Easy for him - when it comes down to it - he's seldom around (evenings too) so I'm the one. Whatever - it would have been much easier to say yes - but I know it was the right thing.
Update: He got a ride from his friend. Told me it wasn't possible. Right....... Now I have peace........
2nd update: He called me at 1am and asked me to come and pick him up (about a 25 minute ride one way). After throwing numerous questions at him as to why he can't get a ride home - he said "never mind". Fine. It took me an hour to get back to sleep. *He told me he wasn't feeling well and didn't want to wait until his friend were ready to go. Poor baby. No more.
Note: he called me yesterday asking me to get him a doctor's appointment. He went and found out that he has a severe case of strep. Can't take zithromax because he's allergic. Taking a milder antibiotic but doctor told him to double up the first few doses. If he isn't seeing any improvement today he may have to go the ENT and have "surgery". He told me he might have a cyst in the back of his throat. Last night he said "Thanks Mom for helping me so much".
Next day: Today he hand signaled me saying he needed to see the ENT. He went, had pus cut out of his throat, and was in extreme pain when he came home. He was almost crying. Doc ordered 60 pills of Vicodin. Keeping them safe until he needs the next one.
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