Well......the saga continues...... My husband - my dear husband--- thought it was a good idea to turn our son's cell back on.  My son refused to do anything we asked - even homework- unless we turn his phone back on!  I tried to tell my husband that if we give in to his blackmailing like we've done in the past, we're opening up a whole new can of worms.  The only consequence our son received at home - with all this turmoil - was me turning off his phone.  My husband is such a softy, always giving our son the benefit of the doubt.  Even before the drugs - I've tried to convince my husband that giving in to our son, by overriding a decision I made etc. - wasn't the way to go.  We needed to be on the same page.  It wasn't until the drug issue that he, at least, put up a united front in front of our son.  That is why things are as bad as they - drugs aside.  T-Man is resistant to everything we suggest or try to talk to him about.  He doesn't listen and argues about EVERYTHING and the lies are getting old.  I know that the drugs exaggerate everything but we still have to parent him!  I was SO angry with my husband yesterday (he had no idea because he wasn't home) about the phone.  The parenting class we went to the other evening was on expectations and consequences.  I was thrilled my husband was able to attend, but had mixed feelings because - although he was taking notes and seemed to absorb the information, I knew that it wasn't sinking in.  I've been trying to tell him for a long time about how we should handle our son but he always thought I was being mean - by taking things away.  Anyway -  he did say that turning on the cell would be an experiment.....to see if our son would follow through on his part.  The problem was by doing this.....I got my hopes up and thought that maybe, JUST MAYBE, our son would work on his school work and do the other things we asked - they were NOT too difficult either.  I think that is really why I was upset.  Needless to say....the phone is off again and computer privileges are gone.T-Man is constantly looking for something to be mad at us about so that he can justify his bad choices and actions.  Last night he came in the house angry with me because he found out that I called the detective about the fight.  I was caught off guard because the detective said that he wouldn't let my son find out that I called, so I lied....initially.  I then corrected myself and told him that, by law, (which is true) that I had to call.  I told him that the hospital staff recognized that the injuries my son received were not consistent with how he described receiving them.  I am disappointed with the detective for not being more careful but - at least it's out in the open.  You would think that my son would finally get it.....that he can't get away from his misdeeds.  Eventually, it will catch up with him.  What stinks is all the stuff he's done way back in the summer hasn't even been addressed in the courts ..yet!  To me .....this is neglectful on the system's part.  As time marches on......he continues to get into trouble - and it's a direct result of the drugs.   I have to go to the high school today.  Not looking forward to going there because I feel like the loser parent.  It's the looks I feel when I step into that school.   I can't stand the principal because he thinks kids like T-Man are just plain dirt.  I've heard too many stories about him.  I know it's only human to like the easy people ......but does he have to be so dam transparent?  He loved our oldest son.  I know....who cares?  Funny, I am the one who set up the meeting there - we're supposed to (T and I) meet with the juvenile parole officer at the school.  As you know,  I've been trying to get into the court system for months and this fellow (who is affiliated with the drug court) is willing to start things even though we are not in the system, yet.  I heard he's a great guy.  He suggested coming to our house, but I didn't want him coming all the way from downtown and there would be no T.  I couldn't guarantee that T would be there.  So I must hold my head up high and bite the bullet........  What choice do I have?