What a difference a day makes!  I know the roller coaster ride of life with teens on or off drugs is scary sometimes but I like it when we're heading up the hill!  T-Man was up before us and dressed ready to go to school.  Said he was working on homework?  Not sure if I was hearing correctly.  He also was pleasant last night for the first time in a long while, as he was this morning.  He really seems to be trying to get away from the drugs.  Maybe he's not addicted?  Maybe he was just abusing and using heavily?  Guess all the negative effects are finally making an impact - which is awesome.  The strange part about that is he hasn't really experienced any of it yet -the real consequences.  If he continues on this path, I am not going to be so anxious for the drug court after all - the desperation is gone.  We would have been through the worst and then "we" will have to face the music - after the fact.  Maybe I am being too presumptuous - thinking that he's forever finished with drugs but then again .....perhaps I'm not.  Last night I went to an Al Anon meeting and the topic - very timely - was HOPE.  This was the first meeting I went to that I felt I could connect to.  It was very meaningful and helpful.  I liked the format, too.  Instead of having someone up front speaking the whole time about a something I could not relate to....we got into smaller groups and shared about our feelings of hope and how we experience it.  So I felt hope and I do now.  Just went down our basement.  I think T-Man was up all night.  He painted an entire wall with the words RAVE all over it (it actually looks quite good).  Unfortunately -- the basement is a huge mess.  He used all my acrylic craft paint (and I had a  lot) and there is paint everywhere!  All over the carpet..everywhere.  I want to leave it to show to my husband when he gets home so he can see it for himself.  T-Man also used wall paint from a can we had and left the top off.  Looks like we made it to the top and are now heading down the hill.  Makes me want to scream ....like I do on an amusement park roller coaster!!   I think I know the reason for this art work - he wants to have a "fund-raising" party like his brothers did.  In the past we have allowed our older boys to have fund-raisers at our home.  We told him no....but guess it didn't sink in yet.  Our oldest started this thing -- raising money for a school in Haiti he has a connection with.  The group of kids that came back then were extremely polite and just plain good kids and no trouble whatsoever.  My oldest, S, actually earned a reputation - as the fund-raiser.  Even the school was aware of these events and allowed him to post posters throughout the school.  As time went on, these events became my second son's "thing".  Unfortunately, the more parties he had the bigger they got and the less control we had over who was going to come to our home.  We knew that the last one we had would be the last.  We knew there was behavior going on under our noses even though we had 4 adults present. The group attending these fund-raisers changed.  In fact, the last one my son had decided to call it "Rave For The Cure".  The money was going to the Race For The Cure.  My son (second born) did the best he could with his friends regarding sharing the rules and keeping on eye on things but it was too difficult.  Well...T-Man wants to have a Rave party.  We didn't even know what RAVE meant until the last one we had.  No wonder the school wouldn't let our 2nd born post posters with the word Rave on them.  Boy were we naive.  Funny that T -- with all that has happened with him that he expects to have any kind of party........ especially one by that name.......