Well now that my son refused going to the assessment it also means that drug court, that I've been pushing for, is out the door. In order to be eligible for drug court one must be cooperative and, of course, be addicted. Unfortunately, he meets one of the criteria. I hope this doesn't delay things further. We just need a court date and soon! My son won't do anything until it's ordered by the "real" court. "Our" drug counselor told us that she will recommend in-patient for our son. And she says she rarely does that. I would fight for it if she didn't because he's that bad. She also recommended that I go to an Al-Anon meeting tonight. She said she is concerned about me. I went to one a few weeks back and I found it very depressing, boring, uninspiring, and also felt I didn't belong. I would say that the majority of the people at this meeting had been in it for years. I am also assuming that most of them had spouses that had the problem. I didn't share my thoughts with the drug counselor because she was at this particular meeting. She did suggest that I go to a different one, however, that actually has two moms (who I could relate to) whose sons went through the same thing. I will try and be open minded and attend. I may bring a friend who also has a son experiencing the same thing. I know my friend could use more support. On a much lighter note.....I am getting more "into" the Into The Light Walk I got our high school involved with. I sent out lots of letters asking people to either donate and/or donate and walk. The Walk is to raise funds so to provide mental health (particularly suicide prevention) to the 50 plus schools in our area. I am the parent liaison --- basically running the "show". The advisor/teacher is doing very little.....which is fine. So far we've met a third of our goal and hope to surpass it by a lot. So far I've only had 2 people respond to my e-mail letter but I am hoping to have a lot more trickle in over the course of the month. Saturday we will have a table outside our local coffee shop --- to raise a few dollars and to raise some awareness to the community. Next year I hope to do a lot more, if I am still involved in it......
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Years ago, I attended a few ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), I think they call it. I admit that I did not like it, because all they did was to complain about their parents. OK, I understood the need to vent that, but I also wanted to move on, but they did not AND, surprising to me, many of the attendees were also alcoholic. I hope you can connect with Al-Anon meeting. If not, I hope you can express that to the counselor. Good luck (What a hell ride!)! Again, I must say that your sons are lucky to have you!
Our son went to an al-anon meeting with a family friend as one of the consequences for getting caught with alcohol (yes, that would be the 2 AM doorbell with the uniformed deputy at his side....serious but funny...teen BRAIN FART) and had the same response that you did. Unfortunately that colored his opinion about AA and when his girlfriend went, he initially poo-pooed it; although AA has been a tremendous help for her. (He later realized that he should be supportive and let her know.....)
Does NAMI have a local support group that would be more relevant? Do you have a chapter of SOS -- it\'s secular but I think value wise may be a good fit for you. I believe they have an on-line forum for family and friends.
With regard to the \"Walk\" emails -- it takes multiple messages before people take action. Do not take the lack of response as a indicator of interest. Keep sending value-added info with each email (i.e. a link to the Jason Foundation) that educates as well as identifies your volunteer/fund needs.
OK, I am taking a deep breath because these next 5 days are overflowing. I will be thinking of you and your family. Have a safe holiday weekend. Take Care!