I woke up at 3 today.I feel good so far.I just want to feel pleasure.It is 8:30 I feel upset again.I feel guity that I did not go to the family dinner.I should.I feel low.I think I have to go out.It is 10pm I am all alone in the house again.I feel better casue I gone out.I have to wait till thurday to go to the club.It is 11 I think I should just live alone for the rest of my life.It is better for me.I am not really suffering.It is just disappointing to find your true love.