Hey Dad,  another busy day at work here today...just taking a ten minute break to say hello...you know like I did when you would ring me and I would stand in the shade and talk to you for a while..I'm not playing pretend and acting like you haven't died, I know you have, but using this journel like I am talking to you helps me more than you know, I can at least say all the things i would usually say to you here, even if you don't say anything back..... I was thinking last night how life seems so hollow and pointless with you gone, but then i realized that its not. I have all the grandkids to watch grow up, Chris and me still have over half the country to visit, oohh...talking about that, the bus is going great, we are still doing the gypsy thing and living in that same place, not fed up with the surrounds yet so we will stay a while longer. Besides the work is good, so that helps make the choice for now. We are planning on Darwin as our next stop, but I want to wait until Mum has settled down before moving on again.  I think she is either settling slowly or she is planning a get away...if its the get away I think she will just pack some clothes and take off without telling anyone where she is going, a bit like when we were kids only this time we won't know where to look.   We have tried to help her and be there when she needs something, but she just makes it so hard, and she has shut out A....so that is a whole new ball game for everyone, I love you Dad, and miss you so much, but I can see/feel  you  around me every day, and i know you don't want me to be sad... I'm trying to be happy/okay.....  not doing so well on that most of the time, but i am trying!!!!!!!!!  luv ya heaps Dad  :)