I WOKE UP THIS MORNING WITH AN EMPTY SPOT IN MY CHEST. NOTHING I DO CAN EASE THE PAIN, ITS SEEMS TO ACHE ALL THE TIME.  NO MATTER WHAT I DO OR WHERE I GO IT CONSTANTLY ACHES. ITS HARD TO BELIEVE THAT I'M ALONE, IN THIS BIG CRUEL WORLD I HAVE BEEN LEFT HERE TO TRY AND LIVE. I DON'T KNOW MY PURPOSE ANYMORE. BEFORE I THOUGHT I WAS HERE TO BE SOMEONE SPECIAL, SOMEONE TO TAKE CARE OF YOU. SOMEONE WHO KNEW WHAT TO DO WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN. I CAN'T FIX THIS THING. I HAVE NO CONTRLO OF ALL OF THIS GOING ON. IMAGINE DRIVING DOWN A STREET A HUNDRED MILES AN HOUR AND THE STEERING WHEEL IS GONE... YOU ARE IN THE DRIVERS SEAT BUT HAVE NO WAY OF TURNING OR AVOIDING THE CURVES . THAT HAS BECOME MY LIFE NOT KNOWING WHERE IT WILL TAKE ME AND REALLY NOT EVEN CARING EITHER. SOME DAYS I WANT TO JUST LAY IN BED AND DIE AND OTHER DAYS I JUST "WANT"..  I WANT YOU MOLLY.. I WANT MY BABY , I WANT MY LIL GIRL... BUT I BELIEVE MOST OF ALL I WANT MY HEART BACK.. I WANT ME!!! I CAN'T FIND ME ANYWHERE. I CAN HONESTLY SAY MOLLY... EMOITIONALLY....I DIED THE DAY YOU LEFT ME. WILL I EVER COME BACK? I DON'T THINK SO.  WHY DOES GOD ALLOW ME TO CONTINUE TO SUFFER?  I FOUND OUT WHAT THAT EMPTY SPOT WAS... ITS YOU MY BABIGURL.. IT'S WHERE YOU USE TO LIVE IN ME AND NOW THERE'S NOTHING THAT CAN FILL THAT EMPTINESS. THE ONLY THING THAT CAN HELP ME NOW MOLLY IS YOU. I EAT I DRINK BUT NEVER BECOME FULL.. I SLEEP BUT I'M NEVER RESTED. HOW CAN I LIVE AT THE SAME TIME THAT I'M DYING? I LONG FOR YOU MOLLY ALLYSUN BROOKE COHRAN, MY FIRST BABY, MY HEART AND SOUL, MY FIRST TRUE LOVE... I NOW KNOW I WILL NEVER BE WHOLE OR COMPLETE AGAIN UNTIL THE DAY WE ARE TOGETHER AGAIN. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUR BEAUTIFUL FACE, SMELL YOU LONG BROWN HAIR AND MOST OF ALL I CAN'T WAIT FOT YOU TO KISS ME IN MOUTH, I DON'T CARE WHO'S LOOKING, YOU CAN STILL TELL EVERYBODY I'M YOUR GIRLFRIEND... I MISS YOU LIKE THE BIRDS MISS THE SPRING AND I LOVE YOU WITH ALL THAT'S IN ME.. YOU WILL FOREVER BE MY BABIGURL..WAITING FOR MY SUFFERING TO END,"PAPABEAR"