25 August 2012

Yesterday’s highlight was driving into Reading with the family. We went for lunch and I was not tempted by the wine at the restaurant at all. We got the rest of my son’s school supplies and a few other odds and ends.
The lowest part of the day was when my son was misbehaving. It reinforced the fact that my alcohol dependency is a psychological one and not a physical dependency.
I felt anger when my wife was watching QVC. She spends too much money on items she doesn’t need and we don’t need this now when my job may be in question. I used low breathing to calm down and mentioned to her that her frequent ordering from QVC bothers me.
I beat myself up a bit because of the harm my drinking did but realised that what is done is done and can only work on the here and now.
Today would have been better if I had done some yoga. I’ll be picking up some yoga hand-outs next week when I go back to the clinic as a daypatient so I can do it at home.
Positives from today: I didn’t drink, I drove without anxiety, I had a clearer view of possible career directions.