Written Friday Sept. 7, 2007:It was Wednesday when I finally got a hold of my Grammie. It turned out my Aunt and Uncle grammie-napped her on Saturday and took her to their house for the long holiday weekend. Grammie said to them several times that she wished to call me to let me know where she was plus she wanted her Saturday phone call with me. She said my Uncle kept saying “We can call her in a bit” for which Grammie being older would totally forget. Needless to say I was a little ticked off. I had called their house and they were home the whole time with Grammie there and they didn’t answer. WTF is that about?! Perhaps I am looking too far into this and blowing it out of proportion? I just feel very annoyed and angry to be treated that way. Obviously they were screening their calls. I sat there and worried for four freaking days as to what was going on. Now I am wracking my brain wondering WTF I did to them to deserve to be treated like utter crap. I write them two snail mail letters a month, I send them “I am thinking of you” cards along with the misc. bday cards and gifts. I have been kind to them and I don’t call them to keep in touch because they hate talking on the phone. ~sighs~ maybe I am blowing it out of proportion. Maybe they did forget…which would be typical. I have always been the one my damn family ignores…even my Grammie said so- Though of course she never ignored me- ever. So, the past couple of days I have been doing a whole crap load of emotional eating dotted with periodic crying, and basically been absorbed in my own BS. Not only because of the stuff with my family mind you it’s other things that have my mind so cloudy. I am so tired of being sad, feeling ill, and frustrated with not being able to become the person I wish to be faster. I understand you cannot reverse 27 years of damage, trauma, ect over night…but it just gets so FRUSTRATING! Ugh! Written Today:I am not sure if anyone noticed but I have been in hiding. I have been just trying to sort things out in my head when I realized pulling away and shutting everything out just isn’t helping. I am here now. Useless drags of another day it was. Not good but not bad either. My Professor for my Anatomy class had a family emergency so we have a whole new Professor. This upsets me slightly but makes me happy. My other Professor was weird. She liked work that was poorly done or put together. I am an overachiever. I put everything in to what I do. Nothing short of the best will I turn in and I noticed she really didn’t care but complimented those whose projects and discussions were so poorly done it was pitiful. So I started to turn in work that was “half assed” as I like to say- which killed me. In return she praised me like crazy and I got to thinking “is this the praise I really need over poor work?!” Yeah, so once I got her figured out in comes a new Professor. I hope he isn’t like her. I am very nervous about turning in my discussion for this chapter. It is very personal and is talking about my small business. We are studying the Integurmentary System (hair, skin, nails etc). Which as most of you know my business revolves around natural skin car products with wholesome ingredients. So this is basically me offering up my blood, sweat, and tears for everyone to laugh at. Ok maybe not laugh but I am scared they will. I hate putting myself out there like that…but it needs to be done. I hope everyone is doing well.Be gentle to yourselves…~Bright Blessings~ReaPS I love this video and song. Its very well done: http://youtube.com/watch?v=dtBnfJvf6eQ    I just wanna snuggle da iddle aliens!