TIRED
JUST TIRED. MY FATHER AND I HAVE BEEN HATEING EACH OTHER AND IT LOOKS LIKE THERES NO END TO IT. I WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HAVE SEEN SOMEONE TELL HIM WHEN HE WAS 35, WHO AND WHEN HE COULD SEE SOMEONE. I KNOW HE'S OLD AND SET IN HIS WAYS, BUT HE NEEDS TO LEARN I AM TOO. IM JUST TRULY TO THE PLACE I REALLY WISH I HAD DIED IN THAT DAMN WRECK. I'VE STARTED THINKING WHAT IT'D BE LIKE TO END IT ONCE AND FOR ALL. REALLY WHAT WOULD THAT TEACH HIM AND OTHERS? I NEED TO JUST GET OVER FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF. LIKE I'VE TOLD OTHERS IN THE PAST ETHER DO IT OR FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO TALK ABOUT.
Replies
Red, I had to go *no contact* with my mother, toxic, alcoholic...bad stuff years ago. I\'ve been in that dark place you describe, but I will not let the haters in my family win..they would only say more bad things about me, so I refuse to *go there*...like you said...change the subject...and I do!! Hugs to you Red!! Your friend cheesecake
Ditto with my mom and I; so I relate; but I learned to shut my mom out completely like she were dead, and I remember the woman that I remember as a young child. When I let her go,I forgave the past and then appreciated the now more. If you kill yourself, you loose-not them. They will think about It hen it happens,then forget and go about their stuff. So for your sake I would recommend venting here, that\'s why we\'re here................We are friends!!! If you need to spew email me @Krause.anita@gmail.com Good wishes my friend................
It\'s been a while since I\'ve been here. I hope you are feeling better. Like I said before, I am older than you, and have been working out having toxic parents my whole life. It gets easier. We can grow up and let go, and love ourselves. I\'m not saying we get rid of all of our baggage, but it sure feels a lot lighter. I wish this for you too. For me it has taken a lifetime of seeing counselors off and on, and having really good friends to talk with. I can\'t talk with my sister, because they get angry at me. I am older than them. I don\'t know if my experience was so different than theirs, or they are in denial. Doesn\'t matter. What matters is hope. Keep up working and hoping and surrounding yourself with good people. Gigi