HEY YALL IT'S  -11F HERE BRRRRRRRRRR  ,BUT GOT IT A BALMY 85 HERE IN THE HOUSE,MY   MS IS NOT BEING TO BAD AT MOMENT , HERNIA STILL BOTHERIN ME N NO IDEA YET WHEN THEY GONNA FIX , BUT HEY COULD BE WORSE HUH , GET TO MAKE MY KIDS  DO THE LIFTIN  LOL . I RECIVED  FLOWERS N 3 BALLOONS N A BOX OF CAND TODAY, SOME ONE SENT ME A EARLY BIRTHDAY PRESENT......KEWL HUH, MY BIRTHDAY AINT TILL SUNDAY  SO MADE OUT LIKE A BANDIT SO FAR HUH LOL  WELL ENOUGH FOR NOW RATTLEING ON HERE , STAY WARM YALL N TY FOR BEING HERE,I LOVE YALL GREAT BIG OLE GRIZZLY BEAR HUGGGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SQUISHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAnd then the fight started............... When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive . . . .So, I took her to a  gas station . . . . .And then the fight started . . . .****My  wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were  in bed . I turned to her and said,"Do  you want to have sex?""No,"  she answered .I  then said, "Is that your final answer?"She  didn't even look at me this time, simply saying  "Yes . "So I  said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend . "And  then the fight started . . . .********After retiring, I went to the Social  Security office to apply for Social Security .The woman behind the  counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age .I looked in  my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home .I told the woman  that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back  laterThe woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt' .So I opened my shirt  revealing my curly silver hair .She said, 'That silver hair on your  chest is proof enough for me'And she processed my Social Security  application .When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my  experience at theSocial Security office .She said, 'You should  have dropped your pants . You might have gotten  Disability, too'And then the fight started . . . . .****Saturday morning I got up  early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped  quietly into the garage . I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and  proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour .The wind was blowing  50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and  discovered that the weather would be bad all day.I went back into the  house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed .I cuddled up to  my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The  weather out there is terrible . 'My loving wife of 10 years replied,  'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'And that's  how the fight started . . .****My wife and I were sitting at a table  at my high school reunion, and Ikept staring at a drunken lady  swigging her drink as she sat alone atA nearby table .My wife  asked, 'Do you know her?''Yes,' I sighed, 'she's my old girlfriend . I  understand she took to drinkingright after we split up those many & years ago, and I hear shehasn't been sober since . ''My God!' says  my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'And then the fight started . . . . .****I rear-ended a car this  morning .So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other  driver got outof his car .You know how sometimes you just get soooo  stressed andLittle things just seem funny?Yeah, well I couldn't  believe it . . . . He was a DWARF!!!He stormed over to my car, looked up  at me, and shouted,'I AM NOT HAPPY! !!'So, I looked down at him  and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'And then the fight  started . . . . .****I took my wife to a restaurant . The  waiter, for some reason, took my order  first .'I'll have the strip steak, medium  rare, please . 'He said, 'Aren't you worried about the  mad cow?''Nah, she can order for  herself . 'And then the fight  started . . . . .****A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror .She is  not happy with what she sees and says to her husband,'I feel  horrible; I look old, fat and ugly . I really need you to pay me a  compliment . 'The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's darn near  per fect . 'And then the fight started . . . .

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

hummmmmmmmmmmwonder who sent ya sumthin??????happy early bday huney((((((hugs))))))))))lil squishy ones to keep ya warm babe its _15 here and windchill -27
deleted_user
deleted_user

HAPPY BIRTHDAY hon..smile....i hope you have a great day.....and thx yet once again for the laugh..smile..

luv
heather
deleted_user
deleted_user

Going wish ya an early Happy Birthday. Plan on hibernating more than usual.

Envy yer heat. Have no idea how cold the rooms are that I\'ve closed off - two of the rooms I use are a balmy 38.5F. Other two rooms are slightly warmer.

So, if ya ever wonder why I\'m no longer a Christian - that oughta tell ya something... cuz if those self-appointed, self-serving Good Christians had behaved half-way decently, I truly believe my husband would still be alive, and in better shape - and I wouldn\'t be going thru this hell.

Sorry about the vent... but thar \'tis.
deleted_user
deleted_user

HAPPY B-DAY DARLING!!! 29 AGAIN??? LOL

WOW!!! WE\'RE UP TO 7.6 DEGREES.... THAT SHOULD BE NICE AND WARM FOR CLEANING MY GIRLZ\' NESTING BOXES...

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND IF I DON\'T SEE YOU AROUND! SEND ME SOME OF THAT INDOOR HEAT, BTW, WE\'RE UP TO 60 DEGREES... JUST A BIT CHILLY-BONES!!! XOXOXO CJ
deleted_user
deleted_user

HAPPY BDAY TO U
HAPPY BDAY TO U
HAPPY BDAY TO SWEET CHEEKS
HAPPY BDAY TO U

Now cum here so i can spank u.

Love ya
Cathy
deleted_user
deleted_user

OMG!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Geesh....I didn\'t realize that!!! Got to get my butt over to the Coffee Shop!!!!
XOXO
Dee
deleted_user
deleted_user

Happy birthday to you! Will be thinking of you on Sunday.

Geez, I can\'t believe you\'re still dealing with that hernia. God speed., hugs my funny friend, Sharon
deleted_user
deleted_user

Glad you\'re feeling better, happy birthday in advance, and where do you get these jokes, I can\'t wipe the smile off my face!
deleted_user
deleted_user

Happy Birthday, today, tomorrow and on Sunday! :O) cos you are worth 3 godduns! xx
deleted_user
deleted_user

gr8 jokes keep them coming grizzz have a hap hap happy birthday on sunday xxxxx pat
deleted_user
deleted_user

You are THE Best!