I want so badly to be sexy and skinny. I want to be a model bride.. I want to shed the weight I've agonized over having during the past few years. Now that I'm starting to recover from binge eating, I'm more aware of the times I'm in binge mode and when I'm not and just wanting to eat for the sake of it. My main problem is my insecurity with my partner. I feel that because he looked up images of naken women that I am not enough.I don't think there's anything he can do, because I'm hurt at such a deep level that I don't see myself recovering anytime soon. I don't anger him, I just hate that he did it and feel I never fully can be satisfactory in his eyes to the complete. I am not his fantasy, this I know now because of his porn habit. Anyway, I look at images like Paris Hilton and Christina Aguilera etc. and just dream to be like them!!! I know they have money, but I know I can get as slim as they - if ONLY I could control what I ate more. I want to have control of what my body looks like, but not starve and do it in a really healthy way! I have DREAMED of having a 6 pack, and haven't got it because I've got in my own way eating chocolate every week. I dont' think a week has gone by in the past years - where I haven't had chocolate. I wonder if I can give it up - and I know it sounds funny but I am SCARED of what will happen if I give it up e.g. my emotional unbalance, my lack of comfort. I need to challenge myself with this, but I wonder, can anyone else set me a challenge to do this please? Or perhaps do it with me?
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hey Spirit, i know exactly how you feel. i see all these dudes with lean, muscular bodies and i really want that for myself. for me, i\'ve gotten to a point where i was happy with my leanness; however, i lost it...TWICE...due to binging. i am on my way back for the third time right now; i would like to be your challenge buddy.
i have thought about giving it up also, but i realized that that would be impossible. how i look is very important to me, however vain that sounds...
Hey!!! Oh man - someone who can empathise that\'s fantastic. I really don\'t consider myself a vain person in the sense that I don\'t seek to look in the reflection often, I don\'t delight in taking photo\'s of myself or Any of that stuff! BUT I am sensitive in this area as well and infuriated with the punishment and consequences of binge eating. I feel I am on my way back too, and I feel ready for moving in a better direction more than I have been in the past before. I guess it is wise not to give up chocolate, and as long as I prepare little rewards along the way I will get through. This is something I need a reminder about; and not to let the internal mess take over and throw me into a binge even at times I feel I can justify it.
Well, keep in touch. What are your main goals and little steps at this point in time?
open to any advice you have or any training (both physically and mentally) you might be doing.
I\'ve just started to walk more in the mornings, I\'ve stopped with the gym because I can\'t get the motivation and hate the thought of going.. walks though, I can manage every 2nd day I think!!
Had a little sneak peak at your blog page on here and I feel that we have a bit in common.
I too dream of having that six pack...!! And I feel that I won\'t be fully happy until I have achieved my goal - I have been wanting this for years. And it would be the BEST if I could get a six pack by january - in time for my wedding. Oh that would make me so happy.
What is your ultimate goal? (as well as the little ones in betweens)
Let\'s do this!!!!