I am feeling a bit lonely today. I'm kind of distant from everything and everyone .. in many ways I want to keep it that way. I hope thats not too sad.. I don't know. I'm having trust issues right now. I know the people around me are generally good but I've come to the point where I am leary on confiding in others.. since sometimes it gets around when it shouldn't. That bothers me a hell of a lot. So.. today I am just unsure about all things in general. Basically, I could wait all day for someone in particular to call me up and tell me that I mean everything to them and that they love me.. but its not going to happen. I am not special anymore (that I ever was is still questionable in my mind). I have trouble trusting people now (since I've been crushed so many times).. I think I might be alone for a very long time, possibly forever. Settle into my home with a pitbull and a boxer.. live in solitude. Maybe it's better that way.