i'll start with the good stuff i went to a superbowl party yesterday! the patriots didn't win, but i still had a great time. the best part about it was that i was one of the people that got the party organized. my friends didnt even realize it was yesterday, so i basically reminded them and then they made calls to find a place to go. the old me would have just ignored the fact that no one was calling to make plans and just stay home and watch it by myself. but not this time. this time i made the effort to find a party and go. it wasnt a huge gathering, there were about 10 people there but it was really fun. 4 of the people are my friends so our friendships got stronger from this party...its really nice that i'm becoming better friends with these people. i'm a happy girl. also, there were 2 instances in the past 2 days where my phone rang and i just missed the call. one time was my aunt and the other was my dad. normally i would have just ignored it and said i'd call later (but usually i dont or i forget). but these times i called them back as soon as i saw i had a missed call. no more avoiding calls for me! so onto the not so great part about yesterday. of course i drank a whole bunch of beer. and i ate some snacks, not too many, and lasagna....which i dont usually eat but she used cheese i actually like so i indulged. then i made a big mistake that i'm not too surprised by. i went to carl's jr and got fries and onion rings. then stopped by mcdonalds for a mcflurry. just like friday night, i wasnt even hungry, i just wanted the shit. so dumb. i was sooooo full after too. then in the middle of the night i woke up and couldnt fall back asleep for a little over 3 hours....it was awful. for most of the time my heart was beating so fast, i believe it was up around 80-90 beats per minute. crazy. i know it was cuz of all the food and my body trying so hard to digest it and all that. so i feel like crap today, physically, and this will be a great reminder in the future of what happens when i eat too much, especially right before i go to bed.  it sucks cuz lately my bad eating is a result of being drunk or buzzy.  dont want to have to stop drinking so i need to just be smart. i know i can do it cuz there was a long time that i was able to not eat no matter how drunk i was. i let myself go a little bit and now it needs to stop. i've had 10 lbs to lose for the last 4 months and i need to buckle down and just get it done. so i swear, i will do so much better starting today. i havent weighed myself since before christmas so i need to get back to doing my weekly weigh-ins. i also have different rewards set up for each pound i lose and even for each day i stay below 1750 cals that i will start after i do my first weigh-in....which will be this friday probably....we'll see how i'm feeling.  time to get my ass in gear!!!