Day 22 3 weeks yesterday! it doesnt even really seem that hard anymore. technically, if i hadnt had a binge 3 weeks ago, i would be on week 11....crazy. dont get me wrong though, i still have moments where i get bored and want to eat and eat and eat for the sake of having something to do, but i dont. i guess its just getting easier to say no. i had a semi-hard day on thursday though. i worked for the first time since i've been here as an extra on a movie set. i never knew how those things worked but this is how my day went: we sat in the holding room for 8-9 hours and then got called to set for another 3 hours. so i'm gonna get a check in the mail for sitting about making friends, having a good time, and then acting on the set. it was a long day, but i'll tell ya, it was better than waiting on people! haha. anyway, after i had been there for a while, i had a snack of fruit and veggies....very healthy and yummy! a little later, my friend and i got hungry so we went to get something to eat and the selection was rather limited so i had a big chiken taquito, raw veggies, and pretzels. the taquito wasnt the healthiest thing but it was good! it was either that or candy and brownies, so i think i did the right thing. after that, we got called for our lunch break. had i know i would be getting a lunch break only 1-2 hours later i would have skipped the taquito and would have just had some more veggies and fruit! but i didnt know when i would be able to eat again, and i get tired and cranky if i dont eat for awhile, so i ate a regular sized meal for our lunch break: roast beef (the other choice was salmon and i dont like it), smashed red potatoes, fruit, a piece of bread, and zucchini. i think i did good, especially since i didnt take any cookies or other crap they had on the table. So then, i was right, and i didnt have the chance to eat again until about 5 hours later. At that time, i had a cheese quesadilla and some tortilla chips. So overall, i didnt eat super healthy but i did make good choices for me with what they had while trying to keep myself satiated. the whole day totalled about 2000 cals, which is good for normal people, just not for me who is aiming for 1500-1800. oh well, one day wont kill me and besides, the food was all free! one good thing abut the whole situation was that i was hanging out with the same 2 people all day, and they didnt know it, but they were keeping me in check. there was a possibility of me eating more than i did, as there always is i guess, but i always try and eat well in front of other people. i would love to be the girl who everyone knows to eat so healthy. then of course, they'd look at my size 8/10 body and think "if she eats so healthy, why isnt she thinner?". so maybe i can be that girl after i do it for some time and lose some weight.moving on, can i just tell you how annoying it is to be at what is considered a normal weight? as i look for auditions i typically come across two types they're looking for. one type is the usual that looks for girls described by the words, "hot" "beautiful" "sexy" "thin" "lean" and "petite". and although i think i am those things,other than thin and petite, a casting director will not agree....so i have to wait to get into atleast a size 6 before i can go for those ones. then the other type is plus-size and overweight. then i'd have to be atleast a size 12 and higher. what the hell?!? why cant they ever want someone who is right in the middle of those? i'm between an 8 and 10 depending on the brand. its so frustrating cuz i am trying to lose the weight, but its hard as we all know, and i dont plan to gain back weight and then some to be plus-size. so i guess it will just take time before i can audition for those roles and until then, i can just go for the random ones i am fit for. i always knew that hollywood had that stigma for making everyone skinny but i never really knew why...now i know. on a good note, i made two friends while in the holding room at the movie shoot! i met one of them on the way in cuz we both had no idea where were were going. the other i just sat near cuz she looked like a nice girl and my first friend joined us. we had such a good time too. i wish i could tell you all about it but its a long story. but i will say that after a few hours of just talking, we began a project, that we worked on for the next few hours before we got called to shoot. it kept us busy, we totally bonded over it, and may actually try to make something real out of it, but we'll see. i think some people thought we were a little nutty, or even immature and stupid but whatever! we were having fun, and what were they doing? reading? just talking? playing cards? we were really delving into out creative side. i'm so glad i met them. now we'll have to see if we actually hang out again or not.oh! and most importantly! i broke down and ordered intrnet for my apartment! so i'm getting it hooked up on monday the 5th. the booking companies mostly do everything over the internet and with e-mail so i need to check it a few times a day. it will just be easier and more convenient for me to be able to do it all from home instead of here at a coffee shop. besides, now i can be more active here! i'm really excited to get back to reading everyone's journals and keep up on the messages boards....i feel so out of it! i dont even know whats going on with everyone and i dont like it! so as of monday, i'll be back!! i dont know about you but i'm really pumped!