Day 11I’ve been on my own in a new city for 2 weeks. I’ve been having a great time being by myself, as I’ve told you all many times before. However, I think its about time for me to start hanging out with people. I knew when I got here I needed some time to just be alone and not deal with people.  I was wondering if that need would go away or if I’d never feel I wanted to make friends and go out and whatnot. But these past two days started getting to me. Yesterday was really gloomy and a little chilly too…I thought I moved away from this! Its funny how people here actually like the gloomy days cuz it reminds them of how lucky they are to get like 30-40 of them a year and the rest are bright and sunny. Well, I’m not ready to enjoy the crappy days, almost all of the days in San Francisco and New England were crappy. I always feel so much happier when its warm and sunny. So I thought it was just the weather getting me down and figured it would pass. Today I went to class in the afternoon, came home for lunch, and tried to decide what to do until my next class at 5:30…so that gave me about 3 hrs. I ended up going to run some errands and when I came home I was kinda tired. So yeah, I didn’t end up going to class. I was disappointed with myself later cuz I know that if I actually got my butt there I would have felt better. So, you ask, what did I do instead? I ate some potatoes and vegetables, watched tv, ate ice cream, drank tea, and watched tv. What a waste of time. I could have gone to a different class at a later time but no, I was lazy instead. What sucks is that I did errands cuz I only had 3 hours but had I just decided to not go to class earlier then I could have done something fun with all that time. However, while I was out I did see Matthew Lawrence!! For those of you who don’t know who he is, he’s the little brother of Joey Lawrence from “Blossom” and “Dancing With The Stars”….I don’t know what Matthew has been in though, except the later episodes of “Boy Meets World”, but he is soooo hot! I was really excited, he’s my first celebrity sighting since I’ve been here, other then reality stars. Anyway, I know that I need to take rests from class sometimes, but I would have been happier had I done something more productive with my time…and had I not eaten so many ice cream bars (I actually had 4 throughout the entire night).After wasting all my time and having 2 ice cream bars, I knew I needed to get out of my apartment…but wanted to be back by 8 cuz there was a show on I wanted to watch.  So I figured the best thing for me to do would be to go for a walk. It felt good and it gave me a half hour to think. The bad weather yesterday may have been what brought me down then, but what was it today?  That was when I started thinking about needing to socialize and making friends.  Maybe that’s what missing from my life right now that could make me happier. But why do I never feel like calling my long-distance friends? Its like I just don’t feel like talking to people, but I know its going to make me feel better. Why would I rather eat an ice cream bar or sit around watching tv than talk to a friend? That’s something I’m going to need to figure out and possibly just force myself to do. I tried making myself do that once before but I didn’t hold myself to it. But this time I’m really gonna do it. I have a list right now of 5 people who I need to call, for real, and I haven’t called any of them cuz I just never feel like it. My plan is to call at least 1 of them each day. Although I have tons of friends, I feel like most of them I don’t have strong relationships with and the ones with which I do, they aren’t as strong as I would like. I want a friend who I want to call at anytime for whatever reason and really want to talk to them, and the same for them. I don’t have that. There is definitely potential with a few of my friends, but right now, its not there.  I think part of it is because I don’t talk to anyone on a regular basis; just when I have a reason to, like I want to hang out (which we wont be doing since we live so far away from each other) or have a question. So it seems like its too late to build those friendships…or maybe not…but it will be if I don’t get on that phone! But I’m really hoping to make at least one really good friend while I’m here. I just want a best friend who has a personality just like me. My last best friend had similar qualities to me but we also had many differences. She used to say that she liked how we disagreed on things and weren’t the same; well, there is just one more difference between us cuz I don’t like that. My two best friends from my hometown and my best friend from college are my ideal best friends…unfortunately they all live in Massachusetts. I guess that’s just one of the cons of moving across the country….and once again, I don’t stay in touch with them like I would like to. Maybe its time for me to start re-kindling old friendships.So I guess the point of this journal is that I think I’ve had enough alone time for now. I still enjoy it most of the time but I’m starting to find myself needing friends….like a normal person! A normal person quality I’m noticing in myself, how odd. I guess I wont be living the rest of my life in solitude….or at least I wont want to! I’m glad I did what I did though. I always felt like I just wanted to be alone all the time and never could be. Well, I did it and now I know that I can enjoy it for about 2 weeks and then I’m over it. I can’t be alone all the time and now when I start to think that I can remind myself of how I feel now. What’s annoying is that I know how much better I’ll feel after talking with people yet I still don’t do it! Sounds like the problem we all have with knowing  how bingeing is going to make you feel yet still doing it….Or maybe all these feelings are here just because I started my period yesterday.…