22 weeks
Well Im 22 weeks today and I think I'm starting to loose my mind. I've been overly emotional lately. It started on Tuesday when I realized my mom couldnt come to my appointment with the heart doctor this Tuesday coming up. She was called for jury duty. My husband still isnt able to call off yet because hes not been with the new job 6 months yet. So I asked my husband if he could see if his mom could go because I refuse to go by myself to an appointment like that. If I get bad news I dont want to be by myself. So he called her and she said she couldnt she had to take his sister somewhere. Reminder if you guys dont know his sisters a mess shes bipolar, ADHD, has border line personality disorder, among other things. Right now shes in trouble and on house arrest and she goes to a councler 2-3 times a week. He said mom cant you just change the time of her appointment or cancle just one....this is important. Well she couldnt go so thats when it all started.....I started crying. All she talks about is the baby but everytime I've ever asked her to go to the doctor with me she cant. So at first I was upset then I got mad. So I called my sister-in-law knowing she'd have to work she said she'd check her schedule and see what she could do. Well they wouldnt give her the day off. So by this time I guess Dennie (my husband) knew how upset I was so he called his mom back and she tried to say she was sorry she just woke up and she didnt realize it was the appointment for the heart. Well she changed her mind and said shes go with me. I told my husband no now I'm mad I'll have someone else go. Well to make a longer story short shes going with me. I'm still mad and upset but I'm not going by myself so I said she could go. After I told her that she could go my little brother, well hes 20 but still lol, called and said sis I'll call off on Tuesday and go with you. Well I ended up telling him no its ok Dennies mom said she'd go. But then I felt bad because he was being so sweet. Anyways that enough about that my MIL is going to the appointment. On top of all the emotions I think Im going nuts because yesterday I had some pains in my lower belly, probably just stretching pains. Well for some reason I started flipping out I actually told myself I was having contractions and thought I was going into early labor. I knew I wasnt but for some reason I couldnt get it out of my head. I even got out my book and starting looking at signs of preterm labor. My husband tried to comfort me and tell me I was being crazy. I told him I think Im just waiting for something bad to happen. I finally made it to 22 weeks and now I'm just going crazy. I think it has alot to do with my upcoming appointment to get Braydens heart checked out and it also has alot to do with me waiting for something bad to happen everything has been going so good its about time they turn. I guess I'm being crazy. I think if I can get past next Tuesday and find out everything is ok with Braydens heart I'll be alot better. We'll see. WoW such a depressing journal. Maybe the next one will be good news. I told my husband its horrible I worry so much I cant even enjoy my pregnancy. I'm at the point now where I should be enjoying ever min. of it. Feeling the first movements hopefully the first kicks and punches soon, getting bigger by the min, decorating the nursery....but I just have so much doubt and worry that I cant enjoy it. Thank you guys so much for listening. Hugs Monica.
Replies
I completely understand what is like to just sit and wait for the ball to drop. I feel like I am doing as well. I am glad someone is going to the Dr. with you. Hang in there and you and lil Brayden will be in my thoughts and prayers.
I can understand your concern. I keep thinking that the further I get along, the less I\'ll worry, but I always seem to have something new to worry about. I hope all goes well on Tuesday - I\'ll be thinking about you and your baby :)
I am sorry I am not more help to you right now. My emotions are all messed up and I thank you for understanding. Just know i am happy for you and I don\'t think you are carzy. Hang in there, you don\'t have much time left. Love, Jessica
if I was there...I\'d go with you. :D It\'s hard not to be very emotional... and you have plenty of reason. Good luck with the appointment! I\'ll be thinking of you & your little bouncing baby boy! can\'t wait to hear the results! -Daphne *HUGS*
that\'s alot to worry about, i\'d be pretty emotional too! i\'ll be thinking of you and Brayden on tuesday, good luck!
I would love to go with you if I was closer :) You would have all of DS with you in that room and we will all be there in spirit!! Being emotional is so expected, hang in there and Brayden will be great!
I\'m sorry that you had to go through all that. I understand that you\'re probably completely stressed out about all this. I hope that the test results are just find, and all is well. Hugs to you my dear.