I'm sorry for the mistakes, but I don't have time to revise this. I fought with my father and he took the internet away. He doesn't know I'm depressed, he thinks I'm lazy and useless, he makes it all ten times worse for me. I'm finally getting better, fighting for what I want, for a better life, well, at least a life without pain and so much sadness. I'm alone, the closest people I have make me feel bad, the only people I have to hold on is you people, here on DS and CVV (brazilian site where they help suicidal people). But he took it too. I'm afraid that now it'll be so much harder that I'll not be able to handle it anymore. You guys was my light when I was in deep darkness, your words made me hold on for another day. I can't take it, this family is breaking me, they just won't stop, I have no reason to stay here, I can't hope to us to be a happy family we were never like that, and we never will. I can't stay here when all I want is move on, but they keep pushing me back. But I have nowhere else to go. I needed to write this so much, and now I feel so much better. But he will come back in the next few minutes and he'll cut my internet again. I'm so bad, I feel horrible, I took my scissor and tried to cut myself, but I'm too weak. As I said before, being close to kill myself is somehow comforting, it's the closest I get to end it all.