Hooray!  I got my test results and they weren't as bad as I feared!  I had a great day today, I finally took my drs. advice and took a whole xanax (I always take half of a .25) I went to my son's doctors appointment and felt on the edge at first and then it went away - I was able to sit through a 45 minute appointment - that is major for me!  I was very happy his test results were also not as bad as I feared.  I was sooo happy today, it's been so long since I felt this way, I tried to explain to my husband how hard it is for me because I am always in fear of the worst, I am always in fear of fear - I think it is hard for somebody who does not have panic to understand this - that is why this site is so wonderful because so many people do understand me!  So, after the dr. apt. we went to my moms (I haven't been to her house in over a year, scared of the enclosed apt. thing) I did great there, then we went to Lowe's and I usually just stay in the garden department but this time I actually went inside the store and stayed there for about a half hour, I did fill a little panicky but I rode it out, then we went to dollar store and I usually stay in the front of the store but this time I ventured all the way to the back of the store, it was such a good feeling being able to do all of this,  I was all proud of myself!