I had a great Saturday, I got out, went shopping, went out to lunch, I was out all day with my husband and it sure felt good being out and not prisoner of my house!  I am having a really hard time this morning, my husband & kids want me to go to church with him and I feel that I can't handle church yet (the massive amount of people, being stuck in a building, etc.) why is it sooo hard for someone who does not suffer with panic to understand me?  I feel that if I don't go I am letting my husband & kids down, but then again my anxiety is so great that I feel that I shouldn't go and stay home even if I have to disappoint my husband & kids  - who knows - I have an hour in a half before church, we shall see what I do : (  I am going on and on with this, I need to be more positive but I am having a hard time.