Yesterday was a sparkling example in the life of a caregiver.  First we took mom to her primary care doctor and then we went shopping (of course to 2 stores.)For a change, the doctor was close to on time.  But she makes up for being late on the other days by the careful attention she gives us. On this visit she said mom has lost 3 lbs again. Mom's attitude is that she will gain it back which you will hear about later.  Her b/p and other vital signs were all good.  BUT - we focused lots of attention to the news about her newly discovered bad vision. (I think I mentioned before that she is legally blind in one eye and getting much worse in the other.)  Dr told mom that she needs to be moved into a more secure setting.  Then proceeded to add to all the things I had said could happen to a blind, deaf and beginning demented 92 year old.  She told mom that she could suffer a serious fall that could result in a bleed in the brain which could leave her in a vegetative state.  She also said that, "although you are ready to go, only God can decide that and we need to be concerned and provide for your safety in the meantime."  Then she discussed the other things that could happen and said that "the kitchen is now the most dangerous place in your home.  You really don't want to die in a fire do you?"  She did succeed in frightening Mom a little, but Mom's reply was the same as it has been for a very long time.  "My other daughter is going to come & live with me to take care of me full time."  This is so sad because she is in denial.  My sister has told her that she will continue to come for visits, but does not want to move here.  Mom keeps changing the visits to she is moving here.  So, when my sister comes over the holidays we are going to sit her down and have a good talk.  We are going to visit the Assisted Living facilities that also have Skilled Nursing centers associated with them.  Then we hope to take mom to visit & tour so she can participate in the selection process.  Then we wait . . . . . openings are getting harder to obtain.The grocery shopping exhausted both of us.  But, my diabetic mother purchased 2 kinds of doughnuts, bread and said "after all, I have to gain my 3 lbs back."  She is so funny, but also so far into denial about this stage of her life.  I realize how difficult this is for her and sometimes wonder how I will actually be at that time.  But with my own disabilities, I have also had to face the fact of potential residential care for 15 years and hope I will be much easier on my kids when the time comes.  But only God knows the answer to that one too.