Today my official age is 8 years old! That's about the time I LEFT HOME! and was sent to another world inhabited by a Queen alien who liked to bite the heads off of babies and suck them dry. Could anybody imagine leaving home and having to deal with the REAL world at 8? I can and have lived it. I never had a childhood and I figure this is my time to come out and play. Have some fun with my life and let loose. I figure being "an adult" for 27 years when I'm only 36 is just way too much time to be all SERIOUS and stick in the mud type.This hasn't been a good blogging time for me this past while - since last summer I have been dealing with childhood issues and noticing the stuff in my life that long went underground into my subconscience come bubbling back up and haunting me. Anybody been through having to deal with childhood issues? Please submit a comment. I would like to hear from you cause I'm feeling deathly alone here.My "emotional" database is filled with old emotional stuff that has been long stored and now useless in my system. Being chronically constipated emotionally doesn't help matters either. So I need to dleted the old hard drive stuff in order to feel lighter and not so bogged down - energy and emotion wise. I have a lot of blocked energy that needs to be expressed and find movement outside of me.Last spring, I offically divorced my family and have taken the Proud status of Orphan - My Family is no longer here on earth - both of my grandparents died in the 1990s. I'm open to adopting new family members out there in www.land. My friends mean the world to me and I don't think I show it enough! They help my world go round and without them - I'd be forever lost.
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I\'m here. Yes, I can relate
Okay, I finished reading your journal entry. You make me laugh.
I too divorced my family, mother. I\'ve been pushed away since 11, 12 13 I lived in another state by myself, luckily the hippies let me live with them in the woods, seriously... Then, she finally got rid of me for good when I was 15. I never went back. She never looked for me
constipated, yes, I find relief here, writing. Research has proven it does actually relieve the pressure. It does work for me big time.
Now I\'m in the process of leaving HIM. He\'s just like my mother. It took me a while 15 years. I\'m selling house, told him today, after he said he didn\'t know why he was with me, I felt it was the perfect opportunity to tell him. As soon as I fill out papers I\'m off to another state to live happily for ME
Yes, I was triggered my seeing my abuser 4 years ago for the first time in 13 years. That lead to my PTSD...my life was turned upside down...and now I have to deal with the sexual abuse. It really sucks that it ruined my childhood, and now affects my adulthood.
And I am another person to leave my childhood family behind. This was about 15 years ago. I now occationally talk to a brother and a sister on the phone but that\'s it. Hubby and I married 21 years ago and we have one kidlet. So I have a new family now. Hubby\'s people are sweet and caring and mostly normal. As for holidays my problem is childhood turned me into a Scrooge and I hate Christmas. My favorite is July 4 because we never did any thing when I was a child. I totally understand how you need to leave your childhood family behind. Then you get to build a shiny new life. Take care, the worlds worst speller, tcat
hey u r totally not alone ok. There are millions out there going thru the same heartahce due to thier childhood experiences. im just glad that we all are able to find this website and release alittle steam or just simply hiding behind the computer screen and let it out a little. But i know exactly what u r going thru ok. I feel as tho im an orphan as well. Ive never really shared my pain and heartache with anyone. i just felt like it was too long of a story and they wouldnt understand. Whatever happened to us in our childhood is not our fault ok. Its these dumb f-cks that we were unfortunate to be borned thru. Everyday is still a struggle for me as well. some days it fine and im happy when i dont think about it. but there are days when i wake up hating the world and wishing that i can avenge against everyone that made me have these feelings. As far as im concern u are a survivor and im very proud of you.
Thank you all for your awesome comments! Greatly appreciate it! It does my heart good and helps me heal inside.(((HUGS)))