I woke up this morning after not sleeping well. I have so much stuff on my mind and I am scared to death. Being tested for cancer again. I had it over 20 years ago. But if the doc is right, this one is much worse then the other. Having said that I am trying like hell to keep a positive mental mind state and dont go their to explore the thought at all. I know easier said then done. So needless to say my nerves are like mush and my depression is not well. However I have a lot of good support systems so we will see from their. I do not believe our journal entry's are suppose to make sense to others but to us.