Well at worry and the anxiaty are back with avengance today, keep thinking that I have only been sick propperly once today then worried that my boobs weren't hurting as much as they were, when I rachanlise these things I know it's probably rubbinsh, fist thing I did today was spend 10 mins with my head down the loo and although I haven't been physicaly sick since I have been nausious all day, my boobs did feel a little less painfull at times today but they are now back at pain levels, I think I am getting myself all worked up because it wasn't long after the scan with Hayden that we saw his heart beating that it all went wrong and I am just petrifyed it's all going to happen again, I am so lucky to be having scans everyweek, I don't know anybody who has been through similar things that have been offered this and it should offer me some reasuance but it doesn't, Monday feels like a world away, so much could still go wrong, I wish I could be happy, I know so many people who would give anything to just be pregnant I feel like the most ungrateful bitch in the world :(