Today is 7/28/07 it's 6:50 im the morning I am up and happy to be alive and know I have jesus in my life.  Usally I wake up this early because of stress at work or just being overprocessed with negativity in my life. I have been doing a lot of soul searching and asking for the answers that can not "give" me everything I need in life, but only guide me in the right directions.  I feel as if I have been misguided in the past and I want to learn from those mistakes and take the right direction in life.  There is a lot I have missed out on that I need to learn. I look forward to learning all the things going forward.  There is a lot of prepping work to be done in order to get my thinking capacity where it was when I was working and going to school.  I don't think it will be that hard with the right balance of   Mind Stimulation, Work Ethics, Personal Affairs, Self Worth, Motivation, Social settings.  I know it will be tough being around people that are not up to par as far as intellect goes, but in order to get in the position I need to be in I have to be around those types of people. I am thankful for them and will just laugh at the silly things they do.  Today my agenda consists of taking my medicaiton soon.  like maybe 1 1/2 hour.  It's a weekend , so I will find some hobbies to do, although it's raining outside if I have to sit inside and read a book then that is what I will do I have a treadmill and weights in here too.  I have been eating so many "MoonPies" latley I need to run them off.   When it rains I know it's a sign.  I am being rained on and god and his mighty friends are for sure raining on me.  I hate it took me this long to expereince and realise how his miricales work, but I took the long road but I am sure I am way more educated than almost every other human on this earth about what goes on.  Maybe not "all" of them, but for the ones I am hanging out with I know I am.  I hope so anyways. I love to learn and I love to know about what goes on in my life.  I will go outisde now and just touch the rain and just get ready to have a chill relaxed discovery of a day--NickY"The girl that is getting her life back together"