I know i deserve so much better. I get accused of everything when all i do is go to work and/or class and come home. I dont have friends... i dont go out, i dont do anything. But im still accused of cheating and lying when thats exactly what he does. He controls me, hits me when i do something wrong, calls me all kinds of names. And i do nothing to deserve it! I want to get out but im afraid to. im not sure exactly why im so afraid. I dont even like to see him anymore. I dont want him to come over or anything. I think part of it might be changing my routine..... like who am I gonna call when im bored....that kind of stuff. I think im stuck in the past when we were getting along. But everything changed when that other bitch came along. I guess i cant leave because i dont know whats out there for me..... i mean what if this is the best it gets? What if he is the only person I ever fall in love with? I watch all the romantic movies.... and want my life to be like that. I want to find the man thats always in the movies. Someone who appreciates me. And i feel like sometimes I have confidence that it will happen, but the truth is....it most likely won't. Im sure thats what everyone hoped for and now there on here talking about how their spouse abuses or cheated on them. Its really depressing..... I have no idea what its like to have someone appreciate me. I want the whole fairy tale thing ( like most girls) but that just doesnt happen. It just sucks because I feel like i have nothing to look forward to anymore. I feel like I just have a sad boring life....