Today just wasn't a good day for me. People at my job made me mad, my boyfriend made me mad...... and on top of that I have been different these past few days, I guess just always having to deal w/ other people and never being able to do anything for myself. I have just kinda kept to myself. I really just dont know what to do...... my boyfriend makes me so mad! He's too selfish..... he tries to show me that he cares sometimes, but it shouldn't be that hard. He should do it all the time....... it really frustrates me because I do so much for him and I feel like he doesn't do ANYTHING for me. I am afraid to let him go because I don't want to miss him. I can't deal w/ that kind of stuff.I had a girl at work ask me for some advice today. Her ex boyfriend punched her in the face and she asked me what exactly happen w/ me and my boyfriend and if that means he would do it again. I told her my situation ....... and she asked me what made me stay. I was like "........well" I felt really dumb because I didn't have a good reason for me staying. I told her because he made me feel like it was my fault he did it ( which was the truth) but there were other reasons I stayed too. I just really hope things get better..... i want my boyfriend to see that there will probably never be another girl that will take care of him like I do........maybe one day he will open his eyes.
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Oh sweetie, I hope that one day your eyes will open and you will realize what a beautiful person you are and that you deserve the very very best. You don\'t deserve to be abused-- whether that\'s emotionally, verbally or physically. You deserve love and goodness. You deserve happiness. I know what you\'re going through, and I used to think along similar lines... I used to tell myself, \"But I see who he REALLY is.\" But you know what, darling? Even if it\'s difficult to hear, he\'s not really that person. Do you know why? Because if he was, that\'s the person you\'d see day-in and day-out. Trust me on this. You are right, sweetie, that you don\'t need extra stress in your life. But sometimes we have to let go in order to get ourselves back, in order to feel better and bring more happiness into our lives. This all comes from my heart to yours. I know that I don\'t know all the specifics of your situation, but I care about you, darling. And I want that which is best for you, always.
With love,
Carly