It's been awhile

So here I am. It has been a long time since I have been here, I have been busy, dealing with a lot of stress and family problems, and just been avoiding everything. I want to get back into doing things again. I want to find someone that is in the area that I can get to know and help be my support group. Sure I have a partner, friends, but nobody that is dealing with the same things that I am on a daily basis. Sometimes I feel so alone. Don't get me wrong, my partner is very supportive and wonderful, but he can't fully understand the stress of dealing with this and taking meds every day and how it makes you feel. I have been very depressed lately with dealing with 2 special people in my family declining in health. It is hard enough watching one, but when two are declining at the same time, sometimes it can be overwhelming. And that is why I think it is starting to effect my overall health. That became clear on my last visit to get blood work. After being undetectable all this time and under 10 copies with a CD4 count finally going up to 622, I guess I got that "blip" that I was told about. This last test I was 30 copies and my CD4 was at 480. I am nervous, but a friend of mine that has guided me from the start told me that it is normal and not to worry. He said that 30 copies is still undetectable and that your CD4 will fluctuate depending on different variables. I guess we will see this coming week when I go see the doctor. I will keep you posted.