Here we go again....

Together again. I haven't logged in for a few months.

We were both miserable and got back together. He knows I'm in therapy. He knows I'm working on trying to leave him. And I am trying to get stronger and figure out my issues. Therapy is hard work.

When I'm with him things are great....when I hear from him things are great. But when it's been a couple days and i haven't heard from him or seen him....I start thinking. And I start feeling. And I try to spend more time thinking than feeling because as my therapist says I'm not in touch with my feelings....tuning out the bad feelings also tunes out the good. It's hard for me to be vulnerable.

I need to start journaling more often here.

Tonite is our usual night, and he's not here.

I'm going to try to focus on working out and taking care of me.