Ugh, I'm feeling such strong anxiety and I'm trying to figure out why. My chest is tight and my breathing is labored. I just want a drink to relax. I'm not a drinker, I just know that alcohol will relax me. I don't have meds for anxiety. It's too early to have a drink.
Why am I feeling this? All i can think up is... well, its Friday and I pack up to go to my BF's this weekend. I drop my kids with their dad as soon as I get off work, and I feel the day slipping by. I have so much to do around my house - and packing to go to his place alone is a pain in my ass. I think that's where the anxiety is coming from. I think. It's the only thing I can think of, unless it's purely chemical. The thing is, I do this every other Friday - it's nothing new and I don't always feel this way.
I just need to ramble this out. I want it to go away. I just want to feel perky and happy and excited to get out tonight. But I don't - I feel stressed and anxious, and it feels like its for no reason. Even if it is for the reasons listed above - come on - it's not the end of the world. So, why anxiety over such ridiculous stuff. I just hate the heavy breathing...the elephant on my chest feeling. It's not a pain... its an unpleasant feeling. One i want to go away.
Maybe one beer. Take off the edge.