Well, it is Saturday morning. Thank God.  Wes and I had another discussion about his father on Tuesday.  This one went much better than on Monday.  I need to try to handle whatever comes my way with what he is going to say to the children.  It is just so hard because he has always been a great father.  My lawyer said that this behavior usually happens with at least one of the parents.  They become desparate and they start using the kids.  I dont care what he is...I will never forgive him for that.  I have learned that he told Wes all these things he was going to do for him...the big one is build a house (so that was very telling for me as he knows he does not have a chance to return here by his behavior over the last 7 weeks)...and that Wes would be able to help and pick out what he wanted ....blah blah blah.  Glenn cant even afford our kids medicine (Wes has asthma) so he says.....so I just paid for all of it and let him know that he would be paying me half.  I just keep adding to his tab.  You think he would get it that he is responsible for his kids.  I got my first payment of child support in 7 weeks yesterday.  How sweet that was.  I also have to remember how much both kids really love and miss their father.  He has abadoned all of us, though I am over that now as far as my self sorrow, but our kids are almost 14 and especially for a son....I just have to focus that Wes really misses him and want him to be a part of his life.  Glenn can tell Wes whatever he wants.  His actions have said different.  I assumed that Wes would see that.  That is where I have to remember how very sad he is about his dad.  In my adult mind it just shocked me that he actually said he wanted to live with him.  No rules, all fun and whatever else Glenn said it would be like is what I have to remember.  He is 13 and how appealing is all the above to a child.  I know that Wes would grow tired because Glenn is not going to change.  He is on the I want to have fun and no responsibilities road.  What a fantasy.  Wes said, if dad changes and becomes what he used to be and builds a house...etc etc...will you consider letting me live with him.  I said Wes - what ifs can drive you crazy, but if all that happens, we can talk about it.  In my heart I dont think Glenn will make any of that happen.  If he does it sure wont be anytime soon - hell, the kids will be off to college by then.  This whole thing really shook me bad.  I am getting  better and trying to let go.  One of the hardest things I have ever faced - Glenn using our children and even thinking about splitting the twins up.  I think I have found the reason.  If he gets one of the children, he pays nothing for the other..then he will have his money back for his girlfriend and to have a good time.  How dare him do this to Wes and Sara.  What a burden he has put on his sons back - make a choice among parents.  The sad thing is, Wes really has no say.  He can tell me whatever, but I have taken care of both of them.  Stayed home for 10 years after they were born.  Have been the one to do the doctors, running, school activities and take care of Glenn.  Thank God I dont have to take care of him anymore.  I heard Sara tell her father that she will be mad at him for the rest of her life.  He wanted to take her to dinner (first offer for Sara since this started).  She just did not want to go.  I told her that she could say whatever she wanted to her dad but that I was not going to get in the middle.  My heart aches for her.  We do have a good weekend in store.  Our cousins are coming down and the kids will be going to the movies and then they are inviting friends over tonight for a bonfire.  We have a fire pit in our front yard.  So, this will be a happy house this weekend.   I am so thankful for that.  I am also thankful for all my friends on here who take the time and encourage me.  Thanks to all of you...............I appreciate you very much.   Have a great weekend!!!!