Well, Well, Well......Glenn finally asked to pick the kids up and take them to their Aunts house (she is out of town).  She has a beautiful home with a pool.  The kids were excited for the first time regarding their dad.  I know I am suppose to be happy about that, and I was to an extent, but given the fact that he has not taken them anywhere and has spent less than 8 hours with them in six weeks, I was  still resentful for that.  I need to let that go.  He is always going to be their dad and I have reassured them all the time of this fact and that he loves them.  They sometimes look at me like I have two heads, because they are almost 14 and their dad has not spent titme with them.  I told them that would change and they would someday have a good relationship with him...whether I believe that or not, I will never talk bad about him to the kids.  That will only hurt them and me.....and I refuse to do that.  It sure is hard sometimes though.  He picked them up at 530 and brought them home the next day.  He could have spent the whole weekend with them, but I guess he has better things to do.  At least he gave them a night.  They said they had a good time and I told them that I was happy for them.  Yesterday I ran into him in a parking lot in town.  Thank god he was alone.  I am not ready to see her yet.  I told him that we needed to get together and start going thru things in the house and prepare for mediation with our lawyers.  We would save alot of money by doing this ourselves.  We have decided to sell our camper.  Anyone want a camper???? lol  He is in charge of doing that, so no need for me to worry about that.  He reiterated that I needed to get a full time job.  I did not respond.  He also said that he has decided to fight me for the house.  I said that if he could live with taking the kids out of the only home they know, away from the farm where all their cousins and grandparents live, then he was sicker than I thought he was.  He has damaged all of us so bad, I cant even believe that he would do that to the kids.  I told him that this house and farm was the kids now, and that he walked away emotionally over a year ago.  And though he came home every night, he left me over a year ago also.  I told him that at least he could have been a man and told me that he had met someone else.  Then I would have had no say with the farm.  He did it wrong, insulted me to the fullest, and is still doing so today by expecting that I will just pick the kids up and walk away.  He then said well, you can have the house, but I get the rest of the acreage.  I said there was no way I would do that because I am getting on with my life and I will not live the rest of my life with a house that he may build in my backyard.  I dont want to live the rest of my life seeing him everyday.  It is hard enough to see him what little I have to now.  I told him that all the land except the house was going into the kids name.  I have no intention of selling this as we have workd hard to build all this for our kids.  I was going to see that this still happens.   I told him I did not want to fight, but that I would not sit back and let him take the house and move his whore here.  That will not happen.  I have plenty of evidence that he lived with her, is still with her, has abadoned the kids for 6 weeks and plenty of web sites that he visited that would make your stomach turn.  I never checked up on this man.  How could I not know.....I trusted him completely and he never gave me any indication to think twice.  I told him I have a full deck (even though he doesnt know what that means) and I would play every card if he forced my hand.  He always had this saying.......Game on baby.  So the last thing I said tot him was that if he wanted to fight me, that I was ready....and game on baby......then I drove home.  I will do whatever it takes, but in my heart I cannot imaging this judge would agree with him.  I cant see this judge disrupting the kids like that after what he has done.  After all, he left...I am still here and plan on it staying that way.  I would be lying if I said I was not worried, but  in my heart of hearts I know that I have not done anything wrong and he has done everything wrong escpecially where the kids are concerned.  I have to have faith that I will be ok and whatever happens will be what needs to happen for me and the kids.  I really hate all of this....not knowing and what if and all that.  That is why I have to slow back down and take it one day at a time.  I cannot predict the future.  It is just hard to do that sometimes..............