Nine months...that is how long I carried my son and today that is how long he has been away from me.  So far it is a day that I feel detatched from this life.  I feel like I am just an observer of things happening around me.  Periodically the tears just flow quietely down my face.  No one around me realizes that at this very time 9 months ago, my son climbed a ladder to do a routine job that ended in a freak accident that took his life.  I know that I know that I know that when he fell from that ladder that Jesus reached down and scooped him up before Clinton even knew anything was wrong.  When I can get past the pain, I take great comfort in that fact.  I intend to continue to live my life in such a way that I can be reunited with Clinton when I leave this earth.  For now, everyday life is still a struggle...

Replies

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Lynn,I am so blinded by my own pain that I can never think of comforting words. Just know that I care and we are all in this together. My last journal was pathetic as usual, but if you read it, be sure and read what Teri, RememberKala had to say, I wish everyone could read it. You will see what I mean when you read it, it was really nice. Love, Dianne
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i know the feeling of being so detached and not of this world. i think i will always be this way. i know our children are always with us and keep an eye on us, but until i am also out of my body i will ache for joey. love to you now, marianne
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9 month, a lifetime and just a second ago. Hang on with us Lynn. Know that we are all here to help each other along this painful path. Love you bunches! Cyn
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Lynn, sorry that you have a hard day and I wish I can take the pain away from you but I cannot. I understnad the pain, I always feel that I am far from the real world and cannot connect to it.You are not alone on this journey. let me hold your hand along the road my sister. love and hugs Robyn
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I choose to believe that one day you will be a partcipant in life again...that you will not always just observe life...Clinton would want you happy...or at least happier...love and hugs to you Lynn...Karen
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I agree with Karen. The day will come when we begin to live again instead of merely existing. We have to find a purpose to our time here on earth and not live by counting the days until we find our children once more. God bless - Barbara