It's 2:15 a.m. and I can't sleep. Yesterday was 6 months since Clinton left us. I miss him so much and my heart aches so badly. We went to his house for Thanksgiving dinner today. We have gone there for the past 3 years and Amy said she wanted us to come this year. I think as the day approached she would have liked to change her mind but things went smoothly. My Mom and two sisters were there, my brother-in-law, a niece and nephew, Amy's Mom, Amy and the three kids and myself. Amy had placed a picture of Clinton at the head of the table where he always sat and had put his quilted flannel shirt and hat on the back of his chair. I just imagined him there and we all made it through and had a pleasant day. The kids came home with me to spend the night because Amy always shops at o dark thirty on the day after Thanksgiving. Kaite and Josiah had their times of crying for their Daddy right before they went to sleep and Isaiah talked about his Daddy. I finally got them all bedded down and found myself wide awake and not able to stop the tears from streaming. My mind knows he is in a wonderful place with no worries, no pain, no stress and unspeakable joy but my heart has a huge gaping hole in it that I am powerless to repair. I know all of you had your challenges today too but I hope you were able to find things to be thankful for. I continue to pray for us all to be able to adapt to our new way of life and for the good and happy memories to far outweigh our sorrow. God Bless each and every one of you, God Bless our loved ones and may we once again be able to experience peace and joy in our lives...
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How hard to try and do things we have always done...when things are not at all like they used to be. But...what else are we to do? So we get up each morning and somehow put one foot in front of the other...and now Thanksgiving is over...and we can move on to something else...before the next holiday comes. Thank heaven for friends here at DS that truly understand the pain...Love and hugs...Karen
So glad to hear you got through the day and admire you all for including Clinton\'s memory at your dinner table. Sounds like you held yourself in check for everyone until you were alone and able to let the tears flow. Now, it\'s time to breath and regroup before the next holiday comes. Thank you for your prayers and I continue to pray for you. Adrianne
It sounds like you had a relatively good day. It is so hard for all of us. We tried to change the day, but Greg\'s absence was always in front of us and on our minds. I know time will make it bearable, but it\'s agonizingly slow getting there. Peace...Rita
Lynn,
We all seemed to make it through, yes with some tears but we made it. Time will help to heal the wound but there will always be something missing in our lives. We just have to learn to adapt and accept what God has delivered to us and realize through his grace we will all be stronger from carrying this cross. God bless you this day and always.
Gary