Wow! As far as food goes, i have been doing pretty okay, well okay in terms of what i deem "good." Yesterday, i took a huge step, and me and my cousin and her 1 yr. old daughter..my little cousin / God-daughter, went to PIZZA HUT!! at first i ordered just water with lemon, but my cousin didn't let it go, and kept pestering me, so i ordered a little personal pizza..4 little pieces to myself. I started picking the stuff off of it, but she kept staring at me, so i started to eat it the "normal" way.I couldn't handle it though, and i purged. I tried not to, but i just had this incessant thought of how weak i was, and how i am fat, and i don't deserve that pizza. Here is where it gets funny...My mom, my sisters, my cousin, her daughter, and I..went shopping later...and guess where my mom wanted to go eat..PIZZA HUT...but since my cousin didn't know that i purged, i just said i was full from earlier, and went to starbucks.It would have been fine, but my sister ( 16 yrs. old) kept saying things.." you need to eat some pizza because you are so skinny" i just tried to brush it off by repeating that i ate some earlier.Hopefully it gets better
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o man, kudos to u for trying to eat the pizza...pizza hut is def not somewhere that i see as safe...so congrats on that...and maybe next time u cna sit wiht the food rather than purge it...maybe just eat 1/2 the little pan pizza and claim full....might help to squelch the thoughts knowing that most people down the whole pizza and u only had half....and starbucks...i love it...nuff said
Pizza Hut is actually the only pizza I like. It\'s not as greasy as some other places. Can\'t stand greasy pizza. I take the cheese off though, which some people think is weird, but at least I\'m getting myself to eat something that many people with ED find not safe. At least you tried. Hopefully there will come a day you can eat the pizza and not give a damn about what it may do to you.
I agree! Pizza is a big step! Congrats for trying!! So glad to hear about your scheduled meeting. Let us know how it goes. *hug* Email me if you need to chat. I am not making it top DS often cause I shipped my puter and am using a friend\'s. :)
omg that must have been tough
it gets really hard when family start pestering though becuase you sort of resent them for it - well at least the e.d part becuase you just wish they\'d drop it. congrats on the appontment
its such a huge step in the right direction so try not to get anxious.
lots of love
xxx