Today I heard from my mother-in-law, a woman I have loved for over 27 years. She said she had met my husband's girlfriend.  I was really upset on several counts.  She lives a day's drive away. He hasn't been able to scrape up the $206 to file in  the last 8 weeks but he has been out of state twice, including this visit. He keeps procrastinating and owes our attorney $1500 so she can finish drafting the divorce papers. Am I a relic? I am disgusted by the way he takes her everywhere and is introducing her to everyoine and we are not even legally separated. I cannot believe he brought his girlfriend home to meet his mother while I am still his wife! Is there no moral code anymore? Is there no decency? I told his mom that now that she gave in and met her there was no leverage left at all. Why should he try and finish this divorce when it doesn't matter to his life-style at all? Oh, I remember reading The Scarlet Letter in high school and thinking it was so harsh. Surely there should be some sense of guilt or belief in respect, though? My relationship with his relatives is altered. they say they want him to be happy and we have to accept the change even if we didn't like how it happened- with an affair. I agree to a certain point, but I think one relationship should end before another begins. I can see my husband dragging this out month after month just to annoy me. I cannot get past the  feelings I have about this. Iwant the marriage over NOW. I want some sense of fairness. I am tired of him telling me that I am just a technicality, now. How could this be someone I once loved? How could this be the man who swore we would grow old together? How do I keep their relationship from upsetting me? It is NOT that I want him anymore. It is  mostly the lack of respect for over a year and a half, now, that gets to me. Oh, yeah, and the financial mess he caused, too, of course. He won't help pay for our daughters expenses except for a token c.s. amount each month and he won't even LOOK for a f/t job. I am having such a hard time trying to accept that he ill not change. I keep hoping for him to behave better toward me. Are my reactions typical of someone who was dumped-AND left in a financial mess?