What a terrible weekend I have had. Seems like I nothing I have done has brought me any releif. I even feel feverish. If I could I would of stayed in bed all day. But I know this is not the right thing to do. I need to try to stay positive. I keep telling myself and have faith that God will not give me more than I can handle. And he doesn't. I always think what my life would be like if I were not dizzy. I would go hiking, camping, ride a bike, take trips everywhere I could! I would travel abroad! It would be endless! My one thing I think of is how I would get involved with the church and help ill people not give up on their faith! That would be my ideal life!
Tony will be leaving tomorrow morning, I struggling with that so much! I am trying so hard not to get depressed about that. He is my encouragement through this whole ordeal right now. But in my heart, I know God will not leave my side. I need to keep reminding myself of that! When I hear a song on the radio where they are singing about "not being able to live without you" I sing it to God! I know that with him I will survive! I will miss my Tony dearly. More than words can say! But I also know God will not give me more than I can handle. And with those words I keep hanging on!